Isn't it sad...that in order to make it thru the dating scene...
you have to have no heart....so you won't get hurt...
only to find the special person that can look past it all those walls
and really touch your heart??

Seems ironic and stupid to me...but maybe thats why I don't do this very well.

I built a wall
Out of this heart of mine
Never letting no one in
Didn't think I need a friend
Until now, feeling this way won't do
I'm ready to give all of me
the question that I have of you
Will he say the things he needs to say
Or touch me in a certain way
I told myself just to be strong
One day the man will come along
- Tamia - This time it's love

i'm a creature of habit...
even though i try to make sure i go to the gym everyday..
or promise to blog about something each day...

sometimes...i just don't know if i can say what i want to say...
i think i'll just leave it at that.

Ok..i cheat. This is written the nite of Nov 8..(more like 3.30am of sun morning)..but technically part of the same day =).

Anyways, today was a good day. Woke up from a much needed sleep to hit the gym. Afterwards met yup with the AX crew to watch Matrix again...in the IMAX theatre. It was great just seeing everyone again. I'm glad I'm surrounded by such good friends.

Unfortunately, because i was with them most of the nite, I did miss out on my 10 year reunion. Talking to one of my friends that actually went...i hear i didn't miss much. I'll have to get more details later.

Oddly...one of my highlights for the evening was hanging with UCSD and UCI in LA. Many of the brothers came up for the interchapter service tomorrow. We were all camped out at someone's apartment when they included me in a game of mafia. Honestly, I'd have to say the those two school have some of the friendliest and outgoing brothers. I always feel the love when i go to those chapters...and i am really proud of what they have done. I wish i had actually planned to do the service, cuz i was almost convinced to stay there tonite. Well..i'll definately plan a visit in the near future.

Matrix Theme music Main Title - Don Davis

Point to Ponder
Are the wildfires still going on?

Ug...Hot shower and a shave.
been a long day at work, ended up staying here overnite.
I guess its karma for all the times i just sit at work.
Likely missing another work out day...but i think it was for a good reason. Hanging out with cousins and a friend. Saw Intolerable Differences, but the company was more entertaining. Plus there was this guy that was straight snoring through the whole movie.

Right now I just feel icky since I've been here all nite. Unfortunately, this is LA..so u are going no where when you hit Friday nite traffic. But now that the major project is done, I can just continue to clean up my area and stuff...and hopefully make it more presentable.

Getting responses on the ADT reunion. Hoping to see some old friends again. Starting to look forward to it.

Supersonic
You see, the “S” is for super, and the “U” is for unique
The “P” is for perfection and you know that we are freaks
The “E” is for exotic, and the “R” is for raps
So tell those nosy people just to stay the hell back
- JJ Fad - Supersonic
This one is to my brother...cuz i heard this at the Halloween party...and he was the first person i thought of. =)

Point to Ponder:
How was the chocolate cookie invented?

The dating game....why does it have to be so complicated.
I like you...hopefully you like me.
Lets see where it goes from there.

If i was a lil kid, I'd just grab your hand and hold it while we walk.
Humm...i think i may just have to try that. =)

I've been watching you
for so very long
trying to get my nerve built up to be so strong
I really want to meet you
but I'm kind of scared
cause you're the kind of lady
with so much class.
- Jodeci - Come and Talk to Me

Well...i ditched working out yesterday...i think for a good reason.
Saw the matrix revolutions at midnite last nite with a group of friends...
It was a good wrap up to the whole series...but i still think the first one was the best.
Got my MP3 player from Ed...so loving that...which brings me to my next post.

i don't want to close my eyes anymore.
As i mentioned previously...music does a lot for me. i think its because of i can feel the emotional connection to it. Music you can't really fake. I just don't know if its been hurting me though. =/

i know i'm a romantic....and when i hear love songs...i get filled with this whole idea/feeling of what love is. When i sing..its all of me...i get really involved...esp if its a love song (more like singing in the car...as opposed to singing in the shower). I can only assume that is what love feels like...and why i find myself in constant pursuit of it.
To me its magical...special...meaningful...and everything. I've created this huge image...of what love is...and lately just question whether this pursuit is as pointless as chasing unicorns.

fortunately/unfortunately...I'm a believer. I need only look at the recent marriage of my friend Bryan and Angela*, to re-affirm my belief that true love is possible. It was actually there that I started singing "freely" again. I was dancing with a friend, when a slow song from selena came on...and i found myself singing to the person. Now this (singing to someone) is typically reserved to people i am comfortable with or genuinely interested in...and in this case...i wasn't particularly interested in this person either...so instead...i found myself singing with my eyes closed. That tends to happen...when i feel i want to let free this emotion...but no one to direct it to.
i found this quote...about love being less of the feeling...and more of the actions. I don't want to confuse infatuation with actual love...but the feeling can be so strong...cuz i have felt it before.

Love...is less a feeling than an action-it's the sustained ability to put someone else's needs above yours day after day, year after year.

I guess when it comes down to it...I'm gonna keep my eyes and let me self take more chances on finding it. It may not hit me at first...but i know i'll find it again. I need only look at some of my friends to truly believe that it is attainable (Bryan-Angela, Jojo-Dao, Alfred-Brenda, and many others.) I don't want to close my eyes anymore...i just want to see the person i want to sing to.

Girl I care about you
I'm there for you
So why don't you care for me,
like I care about you
-Milestone, Soul Food Soundtrack

* darn geocities won't allow outside links. So copy past this into a browser.
http://www.geocities.com/sasami514/pics/angelaandbryan.jpg

ray: ahhh...u've reminded me that true love is still possible
(sigh)
bryan: ha ha....
ray: (sentimental sob)
bryan: no problem.
ray: really though..i'm really happy for you.
bryan: i am glad that i can share it with you.
ray: i was starting to more or less give up on the idea...
bryan: oh.. ha ha
bryan: no.. never give up.. but don't try to hard..
bryan: love will come to you!

Yeah...this is pretty much how I looked on halloween. Rain and all.
Gonna have my matrix marathon today....ending with REVOLUTIONS at 12am. Yippee...

Plus I'm gonna post about music and me...prob soon...so gonna start adding favorite lines and such. So here is the first.
sunny days everybody loves them
tell me baby can you stand the rain?
storms will come
this we know for sure(this we know for sure)
can you stand the rain?
-New Edition

Point to Ponder
What two coins make 30 cents? One of them is not a nickle. If you watched Scrubs last week, you would have gotten it.

Yeah...i can see that.
volunteers? =)



cuddle and a kiss on the forehead - you like to be
close to your special someone and feel warm,
comfortable, and needed


What Sign of Affection Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Humm..
How many "rebirths" does one go through...before they finally make a change?
I've constantly said to myself...i gotta do this...or i need to do this...but many a times...it just falls to the wayside. Well..not to jinx myself now...I'm gonna do it again.

I've decided to be more of action. I definitely am a planner, but fail mostly on execution. I am thinking of others, but now...I just want to be more selfish. Life is passing me by...but now I'm gonna grab it and enjoy the moment.

So...here is my proposal. i'm looking to improve myself. I was about to say.."but the question is how?"...but thats not the right attitude anymore. Now is the time for action...

So here is my ACTION PLAN
Physical - I will visit the gym each day. Its the one club I pay for every month..but hardly go. No matter what, I will stop by to do something. (Already started this past week. Really cool going swimming again...that and sitting in the spa ^_^).
Mental - Thanks to someone, I've decided to read more. Almost done with Joy Luck Club...thought I should get back on it. Tired of mental stagnation. With that note, I will also try to spark some mental debates/challenges/Things that make you go.. hummm right here on the blog. I'd like to hear the comments and see what intellectual discussions come about it. Or sometimes it may just be something fun.
Spiritual - Man...wasn't even gonna put that. My relationship with God is...ok...not the best. But that will be something that will eventually be restored. (that and some other relationships).
Personal - I'm looking at cooking and dancing classes. Gonna look to attend the Ballroom dance club at UCLA.



So with that..the first point to ponder.

If Snickers satisfies, why do you need a King Size version. This also applies to Gatoraid and maybe Nyquil.

double double, animal style with animal style fries. Thats the only way to go now.

Yeah! Halloween..
So last minute this morning i decide on going as Neo (Matrix...as if you didn't know) to work. Of course..sucks when you are the only one in the office getting into the spirit of things.

Anyways...heading out with friends for festivities in West Hollywood. Kinda wanna see the pussycat dolls...so gonna stay out for that.

Happy Halloween everyone. =)

Ok...since i don't post that often...I'll start just putting the lil stuff every so often. Remember...in blue...just random topics. Font in black is the more thought provoking ones.


So...10 year High School reunion this year. Not exactly "excited" about going...but I am gonna go anyways (did the same thing going to prom)...just didn't want to regret missing.

Plus you never know...i'll get to meet all the Joseph girls that I never met in HS. Hahaha..funny thing..in the memory book...when it asked if I could go back and change something..what would i do....i said "go to a co-ed High School".

On another note, seems my company is expanding..and opening an office in pasadena. Definately not time to hire an assistant yet (sorry all my IT friends)...but means I'll be running between offices while it gets started.
Puts me in a quandry of sorts when it comes to looking for my own place. Maybe Monterey Park, Alhambra...who knows.

So I turn it to you...
Comments..comments....
recommendations on where to live...between Westwood and Pasadena?

Teddy Bomb. what a sad world....when u think about it. The symbol of childhood turned into something deadly.

Childhood

Damn...this was just gonna be a short post...but now its got me thinking.

What's wrong with being a child? Remembering the my younger years....when your biggest concern was not eating too much chocolate. The most expensive video game system failed in comparison to running around in the sprinklers. When your $5 allowance bought you candy and a world of imagination. I used to wake up at 5am just to watch cartoons. Now I find myself sometimes going to bed at that time.

Yes...we all grow older in age. We all mature. We become more educated. That doesn't mean we have to forget that innocence that makes us see the world through rose colored lenses. Am i deluding myself, in believing in the better parts of people? Thinking we are more good than bad? If you think that...I'm sorry.
You're in a bitter world... I'm just living in mine.

Dang...if i had a lawn with sprinklers...i'd probably be running through it right now. In the meantime, I think i'll settle for a bag of water balloons and some targets/friends. =p

Also on that note, I'm going to DISNEYLAND Friday....and the best part of it, is I'll be going with my sister (her bday) and my brother (yeah, he's back ^_^).

killing some time...trying to avoid traffic.
welcome jojo to the blogging world =p. I think you're gonna have too much fun with this...and yes..this update is for you.

Jojo got me hooked on launch radio on yahoo....now i don't need cable anymore.
I got a free trip to Japan in Jan...so looking forward to that. Need to go update the Passport and stuff.

finishing up a bunch of lessons in my Dreamweaver book..so again (like you haven't heard it already), expect a site update soon.
Oh yeah..getting back into tennis too...that was hella cool. Looking for anyone that wants to play out in Westwood during the week.

Let me know... =)

Video of the moment: Justin Timberlake: Cry me a River

Man...wonder if I can pull off that haircut...tried it once..but didn't like it too much.
And sam..yeah..after watching Friends last nite...i admit..i'm definately Ross. =p

Also realized that I mumble. Maybe thats why I like IM a lot. I was told I had a soft voice...I said...its calming. But I do project...when i do public speaking...
but when ur chilln with the homies...don't need to feel like yelling. But yeah...working on that as well. Maybe people should call more ^_-

OK..better find something more to kill time. I may just start daily updates. Prob look like this:

Work..ok..
thats pretty much it.
but I find ways to make it entertaining. Either that or outside activities.

PS - Al's your off the link list for never updating. You call anyways.
Diana...I'm glad ur site came back up...I'll have to IM you sometime.

Time....guess i've had some time to just stop and think lately. Lot of things I've wanted to say...and just really haven't. I think this post is gonna be a stream of conscious post..so not exactly sure where this will lead...but guess i'll begin.

First the basics. Yeah..still alive. Actually been busy at work...so I tell everyone that asks me how I'm doing. I've gotten my review..and it was good..and at the same time got more responsibilities covering the Austrailian and New Zealand offices. Cool accents mates. =). That plus getting a bunch of new people at the office...thats pretty much been most of my time.

I've reduced most of my obligations/ties/responsibilities. No longer APO sec chair...and since then have just been relaxing. Still have a couple of responsibilities (regionals advisor/Membership chair), but everything is managable. Anime Expo is done...for this year. Been doing a lot of stuff with members from there. Lately though...haven't had much motivation. Expo is a year away..and we just have time to kill. Nice thing though is hanging with some of my closer friends and doing the Pusoy and Sushi nites. That plus they showed me a cool korean place in Cypress. Ahhh...flavored soju.^_^

Doing more of the family stuff. Samantha's back...so that always makes me happy ^_^. Chiln with my cousin Alfred, building his computer. These two are probably the two family members that I feel closest too. Trying to reconnect to all my other family members too. Actually at my cousin's bday party right now...but sadly sitting in the other room on the computer.=/

so...where does that put me know...mostly time for myself. I'm still running around doing a lot of things, hanging with old college friends, finding something interesting to do, meeting new people. I once had a free weekend to do nothing...and almost went crazy. Sat and stared at the TV...so unproductive. Reconnecting..and also retreating. My life is a series of contradictions. Things I want to say...things i can't say...wondering...wondering...wondering...

I've come to think that what i most resemble is glue. weird huh?

i've always seen myself as easy go lucky...very low maintenance... I get along with pretty much anyone i meet...and actually enjoy meeting new people and making new friends. I know a lot people...and yet...there is something missing. Something i've been looking for. Think it ties into my desire for a girlfriend.

Yes ladies and gentlemen...ray is looking for a girlfriend. As if you didn't know it.

---Cont on Aug 27---Sorry...didn't post and the party ended =)

But back to the issue at hand...oh yes...glue. Why glue?

Well..i find myself as a member in a bunch of groups...but not sure...or unable to really call one my own. I see friends that remember each others birthdays, planning outing togethers, and other stuff...while I feel that I'm still a part of them..just one of the outer rings in those circles of friends. Yeah...and outer ring.

Drifting, floating, gravitating...sometimes as close as Mars is now...(see..i'm up with most current events)..other times as far away as the stars.

ok...back to the glue....so yeah...many different groups. And I find that I can bring many of them together...well...maybe because I only really hang out with mostly good people. Bad people bore me...and usually disgust me. I still "hang" out with them...but i just keep true to myself. Maybe it cuz i just believe in people...and optimism that things will get better. I've seen it happen. I just say that now cuz I wouldn't want you to judge me just by my friends...but also get to know me. Funny..not to many people really do. *Another topic for another day of introspection.

wow..so distracted....guess that happens....one thing leads to another..and yet again..i'm off....yet stream of conscious tends to get you talking about things..and some things that you really didn't want to talk about.

So..back to the glue. Like many of your glue varieties...tends to bring things together...and make them stick. Well..the thing about glue is once its done...you never see it anymore. Disappears. yea....disappears. Especially that crazy glue. =p (ha..mock attempts at humor...to well..hide...)

Its one thing that i've really learned...its the connecting part. I know at a moments notice...everyone/anyone that knows me...would drop most things if I ever called. Funny things is...if i didn't need you...i just don't seem to call. Its not cuz i don't care...i guess i just put myself at a lower importance in your lives. Goes back to the low self-esteem thing...(wow..can u believe that). Don't want to be a bother to anyone.

Actually...wondering why I'm even going a write that....or even eventually post this. I guess it can be seen as a cry for help. (Yeah..thats the psychologist in me talking)...but the thing with me is...i don't try to get anyone's help. Guess I'm just stubborn...try to handle things on my own....and for the most part...have been really good at it. And right now...i don't really think I need anyone's help. (so please...no one try to call me so I can wallow in self pity. Thats not definitely not what I'm looking for.) I think what it comes back to is the relationship question.

Its funny...I had it once before....a girlfriend that was totally dedicated to me. Many at times I felt a bit too much....but I think that is what I am missing (no not a devoted follower). That relationship person ...that can truly connect to me. That can honestly know me. The person that can complete my sentences...finish my thoughts...and in a glance....know exactly what I'm thinking and how I'm feeling.

I guess thats whats killing me in this whole "searching/dating" process....cuz not sure what to do...when to do something...blah blah blah. I'm a romantic...and it will come naturally...when its with the right person. And in time...that person will appear...someone I may already know...someone I may not know at all.

The only thing that sucks right now...is being in love...but not knowing who it is with.






If you actually read this far...I thank you for your time. I figure this blog has gotten around...and still I don't really publicize it. This venue has always been a place to just say how I feel...but if you really knew me....It hardly is even that. There are only a few people that I have "officially" told about this site...and even less people that I truly say know I feel. My life has been an open book, but few actually take the time to read anymore. I just want to especially thank my sister...who has always been the one there for me. I love you Mantha.

OK..enough with the contemplation...just put on a happy face...and think of the positives....yea...positives...smiles.^_^

OK...wasn't gonna let another month pass without a post.
Thought you had enough after that long ass post in June.


Went thru some things...just thinking things out...and feeling things out.
Right now...things are ok. Not great...but ok.


July 4 weekend was fun. All the stresses of Anime Expo went off with a great time. My lil trip to San Diego was a lot of fun too. Been going picture crazy lately. Had to take some time to catch up at work, but currently conceptulizing a redesign. I'm planning on setting up a link to all those pics on ofoto.com.


Found some really good articles on MSN. Thought I'd share. =)


5 Signs She's Interested In You
Top 10: Traits Of A Great Girlfriend
6 Men women love


and after all that...a funny.
Lap dancer - watch how quick the guys will check this one. =p

Sometimes I wish I just didn't care so much. Wonder how different I'd be.
>Lord make me a bird so I can fly fly away - Forrest Gump<
>I'm tired. Some one wake me up when life gets better<

Wonder if I need a "its a wonderful life" moment right now.

Weekend in SF (May 29- Jun 1)

The last weekend of May, a group of friends and I went on a trip to SF, primarily for my friend Bryan’s wedding. I’d have to say it was one of the best weekends I’ve had in quite a long time.
It started out with the group leaving Long Beach Airport. The five of us, Mark, Traci, Jojo, Dao and I decided to take Jet Blue airlines since Jojo wanted to have direct TV. Wasn’t really worth it for the 50 min ride..but still made things interesting. From the get go…we were having a blast. I don’t know..just really didn’t feel like caring about anything. I wasn’t “planning” anything in particular..and was just looking to enjoy the weekend. It started out with Jojo and I hitting each other on the shoulder from across the aisle of the plane. Childish..yes..but still fun. For some reason…I just have a lot of fun when Jojo is around. I got some pretty good punches in…and of course Jojo just smiled..and took it like a lil girl.
We landed in Oakland and picked up the rental car. Tried to spit some Tagalog to the attendant, as she was gonna hook us up with an SUV..but no go. Jumped in the car and off we when to the hotel. (Theme playing – Back to the Hotel – N2Deep). This was only the first day…and people were already looking to crash…but I wasn’t having it. SO of course I call up all my norcal people…and thankfully they were happy to come out and host for us.
We started out by heading to the city, to do some site seeing. There we met up with Christina. After walking around Union for a while…we ended up at Metreon…in the arcade. Hey..it was happy hour…and we were looking to start the week right. While we were there, Biggwould and Steve Lee came by. Of course Steve gave up on Finding Nemo that nite..but I think he enjoyed my company a bit more than the fish.=). Surprisingly, we were there at the club for quite some time..and getting a light buzz. Deciding we finally needed to go…we head out to Brothers Korean B-B-Q. Really good food for a good price. Most of the time I was picking at plates and shooting Soju, till all the food disappeared. The Soju was ok…but Justin then told me about this hot waitress (helen) supposedly at the bar near by called Fizzies. So we proceeded to head to the bar...when my boy from back in the day rando hits me back and says he wants to hang. So i tell him to roll to Fizzies and we all meet up there.

DANG....I tell you...rando...it was soo good to see you again. We've had each others backs since day 1...plus he got me to love the Sixers. We met at my first sysadmin job in LA...and we knew from the get go..that we were bros for life. Course he headed up to the Bay...and I stayed here...but it was like old times kicking it again. =p

So yeah......back to the story. So we're all at bar. Guess the hot one wasn't there that nite...just my luck. The rest of my group decides they've had enough for the day...and proceed to head home....except my boy Mark B. Wow..good times..good times. Called up Vince Ronin from MZ...and it was all over.So there we were...Justin, Mark, Rando, Fred, Steve, Christina, and Vince...saying hi to Jack Daniels, Liquid Cocaine, Remy, Patron....plus a lot of pretzels. Lots of trash talking...but mostly a lot of fun. I really don't remember much from that nite...hahahha. I do remember everyone leaving..and Justin walking Mark and I like 8 Blocks..to go to the other bar...just cuz it had a later last call. Course ..all mark and I got was a purple hooter. Weak... After that..we jumped into Justins High Exhaust Exclipse...and head home. I passed out next to the aluminum cans...and Mark tried to stay awake and talk to Justin..but passed out too. HHAHAH.

End Day 1..please turn your tape to the other side...beep.

So we survived for the next day. Rando hits us up..and we were gonna kick it like before. Hawaiian Breakfast at Puenaheli. Sadly though..that shop has been long since closed. Another restaurant took its place...hawaiian as well..but just not the same. So again...we start the party again. Pretty much took up the whole restaurant. Wasn't too hard since there was no one else there. The original 5, Rando, Christina, Steve, The Ronin bros (yeah Gerald woke up), and Felix and company. It was cool..just chiln mostly. Got our grub on...and proceeded to think of what to do next. After much pondering...it was decided...Haight street.

Honestly..didn't really seem like much to me. A mix of Venice and 3rd Street promenade. We walk thru it...and decided to head home and rest...before dinner and the club that nite. We had decided on Glass Kat for the club..and ended up there for dinner as well. The club was cool...meeting up with old friends....and meeting some new ones ^_-. Best part was Jojo getting molested by a couple of club go-ers =p. He says now he understands what ass is. We ended the nite with some Filipino food at the all nite casino. Dang..only filipinos..hahah.

Day 3...the reason why we came up. Today was Bryan's wedding. We decided to go tp Fisherman's Wharf and get some clam chowder bowls. While we're there we check out the local stores and old carnival area. Mark gets some snap caps and all hell breaks loose. Its funny to see how much enjoyment u can get from the lil things. The best part was when Traci was carrying two on her back...without her knowledge...and accidentally drops it in the ice cream shop, scaring a bunch of people in there. They turned around to blame Mark, but he was soo far away. Oh man..my side hurt it was too funny. After that...we head home and get ready for the wedding.

The ceremony was nice...held outdoors so it got kinda hot. I can honestly say I have never seen a more beautiful and happier couple. It was great seeing a bunch of my old friends again from college. My old roommates Jeff and Chad. Apo peeps Annette, Thi, Theresa, Pansy, Jenn Chan, Christine, Carey, Gideon as
well. Had a lot of fun just chilln. On of the best parts had to be "raving" with Mark on the dance floor. Honestly..just not caring about things is the best way to be. We were just jumping up and down, "battling", on the dance floor..just having fun.

Last Day...Such a fun filled weekend...we weren't exactly sure how to end it. We started by searching for breakfast..ending up at this place called the Squat and Gobble. Thankfully our hosts Justin and now Jen Lee came thru to give us ideas for our final hours in SF. Finally we decided on Japantown. We strolled thru the mall and a number of shops. Cool photo opportunities...as mark and I again battled this time with the cameras. (total 330 from all our cameras in the Ofoto album). We ended the day with Ramune drinking contest and headed back to the airport. Jumped on a plane...started socking Jojo in the arm again..and eventually made it back home safely.
Big Ups to everyone that kicked it with us that weekend. Thanks for being there...and playing host.

Still kinda busy...but had to find the time to write this.
Expect an "update" later on my recent trip to SF (so much fun)..and Traci's Bday party.
until then..u can refer to the pictures on ofoto. (click links above) =)


OK...so what was so important to write about....
well...guess its this recent friendster.com craze. I don’t usually sign up for all these internet hype stuff...but after chilln with some friends in SF...i had a reason. =p
Well...besides being a cool idea...on a really crappy server that cuts out like every 10 minutes...it got me thinking about some things.

I know a lot of people. Thatz a fact. but the question really is...do i define them as friends?

For me...there are varying levels in which I know someone. The majority of the people I know...mostly acquaintances. I don't really have very many friends. So when I started getting requests from people i knew (college, Fraternity, etc)...or people i never really hung out with...had to pause to decide. Funny...simple question you'd think..."are you friends with this guy/girl?"...but not a simple answer. On the flip side, i found a number of people that i know as acquaintances...but wondered if they ever felt I was a friend?.

Really...I'm a private guy. So after a while...the novelty of the idea started to wear off...and some fears actually came up. I never really liked mixing my circle of friends. Each one knows an aspect of me...but what would happen when those boundaries became blurred. I mean really...wouldn't it be weird...if your high school best friend...ends up dating your ex-girlfriend's roommate...that you also know thanks to friendster. If it was meant to be...i'd be happy for them...but i'd also have to say...its still kinda awkward.

The other thing I worried about were people using my name/"friendship" to fuck around with my friends. Yeah...I'd have to say I'm really protective of my friends...girls especially. I'll be the first to admit that guys are dogs... and yes... i may be friends with some of them...but it doesn't necessarily mean i approve of their actions. So...hesitation again on friendster.

In the end... I more or less approved people...just as an acknowledgement that i do know them...but i also left a stern warning on my profile (below). But yeah...if you are on friendster...go ahead and request if you want to be my friend... But if you really want to know where you stand...just send me a direct email. This is not the email I used on friendster.


In response to "About Me":

humm...shy =p... funny (least I think so)... boring (yeah...really)...streaks of spontaneity...listener...protector...friend. I don't talk about myself much...but i really don't have much to hide. I just don't express it much.

-Which brings me to my next thought...I'm not trying to be popular here...but I do have varying definitions of friends. I honestly don't have a lot of friends...but a lot of acquaintances. Friends mean a lot to me...and I pretty much do anything for them. So...getting requests from people I "know"...but hardly know...yeah...kinda a quandary. If you want to go from more than an acquaintance to a friend...thats up to you to take the initiative. I'm always willing.

--on the other hand..if you're expecting to pick up on any of my FRIENDS...cuz you say your my friend...you better not hurt any of them. (I'm very protective...especially of my friends-girls). If you hurt them...expect to get your ass kicked by ALL of my friends. For realz.

Currently Listening to: I want you - Thalia Feat Fat Joe
Mood: protective

wow..new blogger..

and ray actually busy at work..and other stuff.
Things been going well...having fun..so thats good.

much to write about..but not right now. Been crashing at 4am the past few days..so need to catch up on sleep first.

mainly wanted to post on how true this lil article was..

8 ways to turn guys on