Its just another day, for harmony sake
Minutes away from the start of a new year. For many, itz supposedly a time for new vision, new choices, new starts. Why do we believe that the sins of our past can all be resolved/excused in one day? How can everything change in one day?

Hey, its just a day. It may happen to be the first day of a new year, but really…its just a day. The power to change yourself and change your attitude is entirely up to you. It shouldn’t take you 364 days of waiting, before you decide its time to change….and sometimes if you wait too long….too little…too late.

I don’t deny the significance of this time...and I truly hope the resolutions you make are achievable and worthwhile. And if they are truly meaningful, do your best to keep them.

I wish you all the best in the coming year. I hope my own resolutions for this new year also come to fruition. Just remember, true change takes time and effort…and that shouldn’t wait a year to do.

Happy New Year Everyone!

After my picture fades and darkness has
Turned to gray
Watching through windows you're wondering
If I'm OK
Secrets stolen from deep inside
The drum beats out of time

If you're lost you can look and you will find me
Time after time
If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting
Time after time
- Cyndi Lauper - Time after time

Point to Ponder
Progress going well, but will i finish this project in time?

You wouldn't believe the problems i had today just trying to help a user today. Its as if everything that could go wrong did. Ever have one of those days? Well...beyond that caught up with an old friend and helped another two with grad school apps. Picked up SWAT today and So Close. Well..need to get cracking on that project. Hopefully almost done.
Why do birds
Suddenly appear?
Everytime you are near
Just like me
They long to be
Close to you

Why do stars
Fall down from the sky?
Everytime you walk by
Just like me
They long to be
Close to you
- Carpenters - Close to you

Point to Ponder
What am i gonna do for new years?

Ahh..today was a good day.
Got back to work and simply caught up on some stuff. Funny how company politics is...
i've dealt with politics on many levels...and have done a lot of conflict resolution at apo/college level...but i knew that it didn't just apply to that level. Power struggles and politics play at all levels. Fortunately, I just keep my nose clean and cover my ass. =)

Got a call from Rico just to see how I was doing and what I was up too. It was actually pretty nice to be on the one being called, as opposed to the one that always calls. Guess it pays to start "focusing". I always appreciate those that make the effort to call me (mantha, rachel, annette, reuben, enida, mark, joe, alfred, biggwould and a handful of others).

Had sushi with Bren and got his new phone: panasonic x70. So nice...i'm jealous. Its a camera phone with a flash!! i'm still waiting for mine to come out: Nokia 6230. Still not sure about the bulky keypad..but still nice. The coolest part about Bren's deal was the fact I was able to hook him up..since i knew the dealer.=)

Anyways...got things to do tomorrow..and need to be at work on time. So ciao

I'll teach you how to stunt
My wrists stay rocked up
My TV's pop up in a Maybach benz
I'll teach you how to stunt
Nigga you can't see me
My bently GT got smoke gray tints
I'll teach you how to stunt
My neck stay blinging, my rims stay gleaming, I'm shining man
I'll teach you how to stunt
I see you scheming, nigga keep on dreaming, I hurt ya mans
I'll teach you how to stunt
- G-Unit - Stunt 101

Point to Ponder
Humm...cell phone...which one?

Time for myself

I guess thats what you could call it. I never really left the house today...nor has the TV stopped playing. Hey..its not as pathetic as it sounds =p. Rather, I spent most of the day working on that school project. From the approximately 14 computers i picked up, I've finished about 6 of them and set up most of the server. Not too bad i'd have to say. My brother and sister were off to disneyland with friends, while my parents were in and out throughout the day. I finished my leftovers for lunch.

Yeah really...guess the only thing that separates the reality that i'm just a tenant, is that I'm in my parents house. Man...i really should start looking for that house again. My paperwork is in order..just need to talk to the realtor again. Just need to first decide where i want to live. I'm thinking i'm just gonna do it alone.

Something to think about as this new year approaches. I've always been one to simply take care of myself..guess its time to start living on my own. Always wanted a place that i can set to my liking. Someplace that i wouldn't be embarrassed to have people over. Each room was set to have a theme, integrated speakers in the walls, home theater, relaxing fireplace....a place to call my own.

3 more days in 2003....lets see what I can make of 2004.

Here is the money that I owe you
So you can pay the bills
I will give you more
When I get paid again

I hate those people who love to tell you
Money is the root of all that kills
They have never been poor
They have never had the joy of a welfare christmas

I know we will never look back
- Everclear - I will buy you a new life

Point to Ponder
Where to live....where to live...

ai ya..another close one...hopefully i don't start to falter on this commitment (yeah...working out will start again after i finish that school project =p).

Today was really productive. I spent the early morning loading about 20 computers from the school and bringing them home for me to work on. Thank goodness for imaging software, cuz i'm going to have to reload all those computers with the standard software.
After picking up the machines, i got the call from Rico to hang out. We grabbed some lunch before deciding to head out to a movie. OMG, Lucille's in Long Beach. We killed this appetizer, that ending up getting me too full to really eat my meal. Overall though, it was really good. Suffered food coma thru most of the movie. Then when i got home, then i just passed out....

hence...almost missing this post (just woke up..its 2am)...

Well..i may head back to bed...or start working on these machines. Its only gonna be sunday..and expecting a short week, so may just get this done.

Silent night, holy night,
All is calm, all is bright
Round yon virgin mother and child.
Holy infant so tender and mild,
Sleep in heavenly peace.
Sleep in heavenly peace.
- various - Silent Night

Point to Ponder
Why does it seem like everyone is getting a Season Pass to Disneyland this year?

whoops...almost forgot to blog today.

work was ok...just did more cleaning around the office.

I've got my timeline for the elementary school project now..so gonna be pretty busy working on that. It was soo cool, i even got the email working...least internally. Well...gonna wake up early to start on that. I've got till Jan 4 to get it all together.

Chestnuts roasting on an open fire
Jack Frost nipping at your nose
Yuletide carols being sung by a choir
And folks dressed up like eskimos
- Various - The Christmas Song (Chestnuts roasting over an open fire)

Point to Ponder
What time will I wake up tomorrow?

The watch...the pager.
Another Christmas has passed.

For the most part...it was ok. Got stuck at work..then stuck in traffic. Hopefully won't repeat that when i have to work tomorrow.
Got some stuff done on my project..so that was cool. Actually went to church. Don't know if that was a good thing or not. Think that will be a "discussion" for another day...maybe tomorrow if i'm bored.

The act of gift giving has taken a new form for me. I truly believe its the thought that counts. I think it is more of the matter of actually being heard. I remember when i was in 8th grade, i wanted a swatch watch. why? well...in 8th grade, all the cool kids were wearing it. I asked and asked my parents and anyone to get me one ($85 was expensive back then), but no one ever got me one. Later on in high school, the object of "coolness" was a pager. Again, ask and ask...but in this case, not to receive. Guess the point of the matter was more than the actual object itself. As far as the watch is concerned, I saved up and bought it myself. In the case of the pager, i had enough and just bought it myself again. Even during that time, it wasn't really about the object...it was whether people were even listening.

Well... I learned a lot this season. The coolest gifts i got were the buffy season 5 from Brenda and the Bath and Body works from Alfred. It was too funny, Alfred even wrapped them all up and put it in a PacSun box. Shopping at Bath and Body is almost as awkward as a guy going to buy something from a Victoria's Secret store. Anyway, it really wasn't about the items...it was the fact that someone listened to me. I realize some of my most treasured gifts have been those where people were simply listening: Enida's Jaguar, Sam's Talking Boo, Sam and Will's Simpson Bowling shirt. For them and for those that do...I appreciate it more than you know.

The other thing i learned was my coworker Ilan. What he taught me was how to say Fuck It. yeah...i've know how to say that before =p, but truly it was a lesson in self assertion. Yeah i like to think of others, sometimes more than myself...well...now i'm just doing a little more of the latter. Does it sound selfish?...oh well...too bad. I'm looking to get more into a core for myself. My friends tell me i've been spreading myself too thin..well...now I'm just focusing on things. So..this Christmas day i actually spent with Rico. He's like a brother to me and has always been there, even though i never called him every week...or sometimes even for months. I've had enough people come and go in my life, now I'm just gonna focus on to those that mean more to me. I'm also gonna be more assertive and direct in general. Also being true to myself. Not trying to be cool, just being myself. Guess this means I'm growing up.

"When I was a child I spoke as a child I understood as a child I thought as a child;
but when I became a man I put away childish things." I Cor. xiii. 11.

Do you remember me?
I sat upon your knee
I wrote to you with childhood fantasies
Well I'm all grown up now
Can you still help somehow?
I'm not a child but my heart still can dream

So here's my lifeful wish
My grown up Christmas List
Not for myself
But for a world in need

No more lives torn apart
That wars will never start
And time will heal our hearts
Every man will have a friend
That right will always win
And love will never end
This is my grown up Christmas List
- various - My grown up Christmas List

Point to Ponder
You can hear me all day...but do you truly listen?
Something to think about over my starbucks coffee. =/

Man..and u thought i lived at work??? Practically.
I'm taking 2 weeks off in January for my Japan trip..so i didn't want to see like i was abusive and ask for Fri Dec 26 or Jan 2 off. Sucks when the holidays are on a Thursday, yet the next day is still a work day. I was thinking about taking fri off anyways, since I had to work on that school project, but my coworker (married with kids..) asked if he could take it for family stuff. So yes..i'll be in on Friday. Hopefully I'll take off early. I'd be gone right now if it wasn't for all the accidents and traffic on the freeways right now.
Well just want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

People making lists, buying special gifts,
It's a time to be kind to one and all
It's that time of year when good friends are dear
And you wish you could give more
Than just presents from a store

Why don't you give love on Christmas day (on Christmas day)
Oh even the man who has everything
Would be so happy if you would bring
Him love on Christmas day (on Christmas day)
No greater gift is there than love
- Jackson 5 - Give love on Christmas day

Point to Ponder
How is next year gonna be different?

Oh..again...MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR ^_^

Took this quiz...pretty accurate and interesting.

You are Form 1, Goddess: The Creator.

"And The Goddess planted the acorn of life.
She cried a single tear and shed a single drop
of blood upon the earth where she buried it.
From her blood and tear, the acorn grew into
the world."

Some examples of the Goddess Form are Gaia (Greek),
Jehova (Christian), and Brahma (Indian).
The Goddess is associated with the concept of
creation, the number 1, and the element of
earth.
Her sign is the dawn sun.

As a member of Form 1, you are a charismatic
individual and people are drawn to you.
Although sometimes you may seem emotionally
distant, you are deeply in tune with other
people's feelings and have tremendous empathy.
Sometimes you have a tendency to neglect your
own self. Goddesses are the best friends to
have because they're always willing to help.


Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

The last of the shopping is over. Should be able to finish the wrapping tonite. Don't know if i can say i into the spirit yet...but oddly enough i keep singing these are a few of my favorite things as i walk thru target. I think the best moment of today was when my coworker opened my gift to her. As she unwrapped the paper and saw the exercise/fitness ball box, she faked a smile as she seemed thankful for the gift. She was checking the inside of the box for the instructional video tape as she found the real gift inside: tapes of christmas shows that she used to watch during her childhood. She was soo happy...and i think i was happier because of it. Both my coworkers got me gift certificates to places, since as some of you may know, i'm a bit difficult to shop for. =p
Had more to write, but been watching japanese dramas and my bro just came home. Still gotta work tomorrow...so i think i'll close out here.

Said the night wind to the little lamb,
Do you see what I see?
Way up in the sky, little lamb,
Do you see what I see?
A star, a star, dancing in the night
With a tail as big as a kite,
With a tail as big as a kite.
- various - Do you see what I see

Point to Ponder
Should I take Friday off?

Humm..last minute shopping..or LOTR again. We'll see what happens.
And since Brenda asked =p, plus i had been working on one...the wish list. Yes..i know..3 days before xmas...I'm not expecting anything..really. But here are some things I've been eyeing.

The wish list. Also added to side panel for ur convenience =p.

I broke my bat on Johnny's head,
Somebody snitched on me.
I hid a frog in sister's bed,
Somebody snitched on me.
I spilled some ink on Mommy's rug,
I made Tommy eat a bug,
Bought some gum with a penny slug,
Somebody snitched on me.

Oh, I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas,
Mommy and Daddy are mad,
I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas,
'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad.
- various, I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas

Point to Ponder
LOTR or Crazy malls?

Getting most of the christmas shopping done...and oddly getting sleep as well. Hoping to get done soon...prob do some shopping during my lunch break. The holiday kickback (yes maureen, i know.. kickback..not party) last nite was cool, nice seeing everyone again. i don't know...got me thinking again. glue i tell u. I started looking to myself to see where i fit in. I don't blame anyone, and i don't want to sit here and wallow in self-pity. Funny, how growing up i always felt i was the social outcast (well..i was)..and how i always wanted to be the popular one...the irony now. I talked to joe today and he was saying how he was amazed that i actually know the 200+ people in friendster, whereas i told him i rather envied the 40 closer friends he had. I don't know...maybe a change is needed i guess....something different. Oddly enough I got a friendster message from one of my friends from wayy back in elementary school. Back when i had only a "core" set of friends. Think it might be time to get back to my roots...or branch out entirely to something new. I know i just need a change. I feel like I'm stagnating.

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And auld lang syne?

CHORUS:
For auld lang syne, my dear,
For auld lang syne,
We'll tak a cup of kindness yet,
For auld lang syne!
- various - Auld Lang Syne

Point to Ponder
I think i'm needed an "Its a Wonderful Life" moment.

Got some of the christmas shopping done today...and a good idea for the rest. Overall just a fun day chilln with my nerdy sis *sniff..hee hee...gryffindor.* Got a cha cha lesson and fought off hordes of people at the mall. I never remembered it being this crazy. Oh well..got some of the harder to find items...so hopefully tomorrow will be easier. In the meantime, off to the kick back. Kinda tired...but figured i'd post this now before i forget later.

Deck the halls with boughs of holly,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Tis the season to be jolly,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
- various - Deck the Halls

Point to Ponder
When am i gonna wrap all this stuff??

Today was cool, got to wrap up most of my work responsibilities. The next few weeks will be relatively quiet as well, since most of the people will be off on vacation. This is great timing, since i need to gear up and finish the school network. For right now though, i need to focus on christmas shopping this weekend. Dang, only a couple more days till christmas...and i haven't had time to think about much. Planning on chilling after the xmas shopping headache at Maureen's lil kick back.
Tonite I attended the Laker-Nuggets game. Box Seats courtesy of Staples, since i won the office raffle earlier last week. The select 4 of us we able to chill in this little lounge room for the game. It was really cool and I had fun. The game itself..i don't know. I start to wonder about professional sports...cuz it just didn't seem to have the energy..or passion. Seems really choreographed and had no fluidity. Carmello Anthony made for a good show..but of course...the man you can never keep down...definitely made his mark. The Lakers, after blowing a 10 and sometimes 15 point lead throughout the game, got tied up in the last 2 secs. The final fade away made by the player that almost wasn't there due to his court case in Colorado...of course..Kobe Bryant. Hey...i'm always down for a good ball game...and the boy's got skill....but for some reason...i still can't see myself as a laker fan. I respect the game....but its gotta be something special to appreciate the whole team.(Lakers of the 80's...Showtime....that was a team).



Hark! The herald angels sing,
'Glory to the new born King;
Peace on earth and mercy mild,
God and sinners reconciled.
Joyful, all ye nations rise,
Join the triumph of the sky;
With th'angelic host proclaim,
'Christ is born in Bethlehem!'
- various - Hark! The herald angels sing

Point to Ponder
Why do people kiss under the mistletoe?

Ahh...finally some time to relax and think about a blog again. Ahh...let me finish with what i was going to say a couple days ago.
Soooo... I was talking to a friend online and she was telling me how she was having "issues" with her relationship. Nothing too unusual, but it made me sad, since i really care about this girl. In the past, I was willing to do pretty much anything for her, but the feelings weren't mutual as she did not want a long distance relationship (she's from Norcal). There was one point when i drove up 7 hours to Davis just to see her, all the while questioning why i would even do this for anyone...when i wasn't sure if she felt the same. Oddly enough, all those questions subsided when i saw her that night. Well...she has always been honest with me...and although we didn't pursue a relationship...the friendship has always been there.

Anyways, during that whole time, I could never really tell her how i felt. I was at a point when i wanted to tell her that i loved her, but couldn't say the words...cuz i wasn't sure how she felt. I always felt that before I could say that...it would have to be mutual. I guess that stems from a misconception about love.

Its a scary word...i know it. Many people fear it...or are constantly pursuing it, when in reality, its just a word.

One of the good things i took from Matrix Revolutions (and there were only a few), was an understanding that Love is but a word...but is signifies something more...a connection. The connection is what is meaningful, and goes beyond definition. Another idea taken Love Actually, is that Love is all around us...and the stories intertwined in the movie show the different types of love. Funny huh...one word with so many different interpretations.
I guess thats what i've learned so far in my life. I'd been seeking this unattainable love/connection...when all the while i already had it. Now once i find that special person that takes it to a higher level, then that will be something to write more about.

...cant you see...im not perfect...
and my journey isnt to find the perfect person.
i'm trying to find an imperfect person and love them in a perfect way...
-Taken from a friends away message



Last Christmas
I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year
To save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance
But you still catch my eye
Tell me baby
Do you recognize me?
Well
It's been a year
It doesn't surprise me
I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I love you"
I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you kissed me now
I know you'd fool me again
- wham - Last Christmas

Point to Ponder
Why was the google search i did on love consist primarily on webpages with religious undertones?

Almost made through today. woke up, but got on that call late this morning. Have to visit the site in pasadena tomorrow, but just felling tired all day. Gonna take a nap now...and maybe add more to this post...but usually once i go to sleep..its over.

*later edit - Nope...didn't wake up =p

Silent night, holy night,
All is calm, all is bright
Round yon virgin mother and child.
Holy infant so tender and mild,
Sleep in heavenly peace.
Sleep in heavenly peace.
- various - Silent Night

Point to Ponder
Wonder if I'll have the patience to read LOTR now that i've seen all the movies?

Gonna make this brief. Most of the way through this busy week.
Had a luncheon as a thanks for all the work i've done...personally just doing what i felt i needed to do...but nice all the same. Right after that got stuck working on email issues for the next 3 hours..ugh
Got to see the producers...and i think it was really fun. Had a good time there, before mantha and i raced off to see Return of the King. That too was great. Bunch of friends came out for that as well. Actually got Rico out there..and haven't seen him in soo long. And Quyen was out there too =)
Well..its now 5am (yeah...still considering it part of my tues)...and i have a office phone call at 8am...so i think i'll crash now. Only thing left for this week is Laker game on Friday...and maybe rent again on thurs...
Oh well..nite.

When I'm worried and I can't sleep
I count my blessings instead of sheep
And I fall asleep
Counting my blessings
- Bing Crosby, White Christmas - Count Your Blessings Instead Of Sheep

Point to Ponder
Should i even sleep? I hope i wake up.

Arrgg. I hate dealing with stupid people. I woke up and was immediately made angry by someone from verizon. Hard to believe all the trouble i'm getting into to just to have them extend their own telephone line. "we don't do that in this department, call here." "You'll need to call the provider and get them to authorize." and of course, my favorite, "We don't talk to end-users (being me)". Right after that I get the sales guy for the telephone service provider for my office, trying to sell me a new system, when i don't make those decisions...my corporate office does. All of this, plus some plans i needed for our new office made for quite a busy day.
On a good note, in the car ride over, i was able to start drafting a list of people i want to buy for...as well as a xmas list for myself of things. Lately I haven't really been desiring much (and what i have...i've already bought)...but then again i don't want for find old gift certificates never redeemed or things i don't use...so i'll make a list.
I had a post that i wanted to include in here...but instead i just sat and talked to my sister. I'll prob save it for tomorrow.

Someday at Christmas men won't be boys
Playing with bombs like kids play with toys
One warm December our hearts will see
A world where men are free

Someday at Christmas there'll be no wars
When we have learned what Christmas is for
When we have found what life's really worth
There'll be peace on earth
- Stevie Wonder - Someday at Christmas

Point to Ponder
The song always sounded cool...but didn't realize its undertones. Guess it is appropriate considering current world situation.

Christmas season is here..and i'm not quite ready. Did something despite being hurt...and i almost made it thru it...but didn't quite. I tried to be the bigger person...but couldn't stop the anger/hurt in my heart. Again makes it even worse when they don't even know. My consolation is that mantha is back.
Started looking at the pics from Mark's party...it was fun...but yeah...i don't think i'll keep that camera.

O Holy Night
The stars are brightly shining
It is the night of our dear Savior's birth
Long lay the world in sin and error pining
Till he appeared
And the soul felt its worth
The thrill of hope
The weary world rejoices
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn
Fall on your knees
O hear the angel voices
O night divine
O night when Christ was born
O night divine
O night, o night divine
- various - O Holy Night

Point to Ponder
Can i really get into J-music...when i don't understand it? Sometimes music transcends languages.

Caught up on movies today...Last Samurai and Somethings got to give. That and sleep pretty much occupied my day. Should be working on the School server...but guess that will have to wait for tomorrow. Busy week ahead...Producers on tues, LOTR on Wed 1am, Laker game on Fri...and maybe Rent again on Thurs. Somehow gotta figure when I'll finish the school project. Well..i'll think about that tomorrow....got a meeting at noon i don't want to miss. Plus mantha is driving home today as well. woohoo.

Think of your fellow man
Lend him a helping hand
Put a little love in your heart
You see it's getting late
Oh, please don't hesitate
Put a little love in your heart

And the world will be a better place
And the world will be a better place
For you and me
You just wait and see
- various - Put a little love in your heart

Point to Ponder
What is missing in my life?

Just getting back from Mark/Ed/Alan's party. It was fun. I had a lot to think about during the day..and i'm just thankful for friends like Vivian and Ilan to kinda keep me grounded. It was great seeing everyone again. As for right now, I think I'm just gonna hit the sack. Nite.

Just hear those sleigh bells jing - a - ling
Ring - ting - ting - a - ling too
It's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you
Outside the snow is fallin
And friends are calling you
It's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you

Let's have a very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year (a happy new year)
Give with love and joy and happiness
And lots of good cheer
I want you to have
A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year ( a happy new year)
Filled with love and joy and happiness
And lots of good cheers
- TLC - Sleigh Ride

Point to Ponder
Why to i get attached so easily?

Today was a crazy and hectic day. I got into a meeting for planning the new office. I think i held my own somewhat, but there was a lot of things that just went over my head.
After that i sat on the phone all day...trying to talk to telephone companies. One to run a line to our office (that should have been done a month ago) and the other to transfer an existing phone number to a new phone. Thought it was easy?? HECK NO.
It was for my boss, so you know it had to be done. He got a new phone and assumed it would just transfer over easy. yeah..i was thinking that the whole 2 hours i was on hold with ATT. Supposedly of all the companies, they have been the worse. Course..i'll prob be switching to T-mobile in March..when my contract finishes...so hopefully all the "technical" difficulties will be solved by then. Anyways, I called again from home and fortunately got thru. Unfortunately, once they got all the information, their system went down for maintenance. ARRGG. Oh well, we'll see what happens tomorrow.
I'm glad that my work loves me...course since i love working there. They are having a luncheon in my honor next week, for all the work i've done. Funny, i just do what i have to do. I was happy when my coworker got mad that i had been on the phone for soo long...cuz she didn't think it was all worth it. They are all great and I've been very fortunate. Crazy thing too...we had gotten 4 tickets to the VIP box at the Staples Center for the Lakers-Nuggets game next week Dec 19. We had an office drawing and I was one of the lucky 4. Oh yeah...thats gonna be fun.
Just doing clean up stuff...office, room, life. Still disappointed with that Canon camera...and now on another search for a good camera (still testing to compare). I don't know what it is about the sony camera that takes such clear pics. May look into the DSC-P92. Depending how if i go back to sony could also alter my cell phone plans. Well...either way, it won't be till next year for that anyways. Sony p900 or Nokia 6230.

O little town of Bethlehem
How still we see thee lie
Above thy deep and dreamless sleep
The silent stars go by
Yet in thy dark streets shineth
The everlasting Light
The hopes and fears of all the years
Are met in thee tonight
- various - O little town of Bethlehem

Point to Ponder
What digi-camera??? arrgg

Grrr...disappointed in the canon camera. Prob gonna return it since i don't like how the pics are coming out. Also found my next mobile phone...but have to wait till next year before it comes out. Well..cube seems to get jealous since i have to sit in a high chair to use the computer now, so I'll have to try to do these during the day or so. Anyways..i'm out. Nite.

The first Noel, the angels did say
Was to certain poor shepherds in fields as they lay
In fields where they lay keeping their sheep
On a cold winter's night that was so deep
Noël, Noël, Noël, Noël
Born is the King of Israel!
- various - The first Noel

Point to Ponder
Trista and Ryan married...but why did all the other reality couples start breaking up?

Not much going on today. Got to see RENT and i did enjoy it. Unlike Miss Saigon, i kept from listening to the soundtrack and stuff so that i could be surprised when i saw it...and it was good. Not sure if i'll see it again, since i found out Starlight express will be around in Feb as well. Been spending quite a bit, on the theater alone. Not sure how "impressed" i am with this camera. Seems to give everyone demon Red-eye or come out blurry. I'll have to do more test shots and see if i can get better with it. Oh well...nite. Got a call in the morning.

Let it snow, let it snow
Let it snow on me
Hey, it's another Christmas holiday
It's a joyous thing
Let the angels sing
'Cause we're together
We got a thing can't let it slip away
Go outside it's raining sleet
When our bodies meet
I don't care about the weather
- BoysIIMen - Let it snow

Point to Ponder
Should I see Rent again..or save for Starlight express?

Was still thinking about the "doing too much" comments i got earlier. Decided to call up one of my homeboys that i haven't talked to in a while, Al. We kinda share the same mentality on stuff....you'll rest when your dead. Yeah.. I know it sounds very dramatic...but its been our philosophy. I've sat at home at times..and just bored out of my mind. The one quarter i "took it easy" was the quarter i did the worst in...while the quarter i overdid it with 25 units and had no time for anything...was the only quarter i got on deans list. I guess it helps keep me focused in some sense (doesn't that sound ironic...doing too much to keep focus?). I guess it just gave me no time to wander...
Al on the other hand is keeping himself busy with like 2+ jobs, school, girlfriend, family..u name it. So much so he hasn't had much time to kick it with me =p. But its ok..we still know we got each others back...
I guess thats what it comes down to. I always have to have something going on. Even now as i type this blog...i've got Pirates playing in the background (BEST movie of the summer).
Well...the houses in the neighborhood are all lit up in the xmas spirit. Some people when all out with motorized reindeer and snowmen. I'm sorta feeling the christmas spirit myself...but also feel stifled. Actually wish i had my own home to decorate. Where i live is ok, but i feel more like a tenant than anything else. Now its just a matter of finding where i want to live.

Sleigh bells ring
Are you listening
In the lane
Snow is glistening
A beautiful sight
We're happy tonight
Walking in a winter wonderland

Gone away is the bluebird
Here to stay is a new bird
He sings a love song
As we go along
Walking in a winter wonderland.
- Lonestar - Winter Wonderland

Point to Ponder
People are already asking me what i want for xmas. Dang..i need to make my 2 lists soon...who to buy for..and what i may want. =p

Today was a pretty lax day. Caught up on sleep and dropped off the computers at the school. Didn't really do much, but i guess it will give me a chance to focus for this week. RENT on Tues... plus an office visitor thursday or friday. Glad the computers are out...so gives me a chance to clean up around my room. Basically doing the same at the office as well. Seems a lil symbolic.
(PS - This would have posted on time, but loss internet connection. Sorry..i'd like to keep consistent with this commitment, since i've been lagging on the working out.)

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring
Snowin' and blowin' up bushels of fun
Now the jingle hop has begun

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells chime in jingle bell time
Dancin' and prancin' in Jingle Bell Square
In the frosty air

What a bright time, it's the right time
To rock the night away
Jingle bell time is a swell time
To go glidin' in a one-horse sleigh
- Bobby Rydell - Jingle Bell Rock

Point to Ponder
When am i going to work out again?

I'm tired (sun 4.30am)
As I was setting up to write a this entry i "accidentally" called a friend. Circumstances aside, it was a really good conversation, learning more about her and myself in the process. Tonite was also the nite of the CRA office Xmas party. I'd have to say what i learned from both of these things today that there is nothing wrong with just being me. Many times i find myself changing to meet what other "expect" of me. Now in every instance, i'm still being myself (i hate people that are fake). I just am a multi-facited individual (wow...big word even at 4am) that only chooses to show what part of me would make the other person most comfortable. I tend to wonder is if that is all that they think i am.
APO Ray, Work Ray, Family Ray, Friend Ray....all different sides...all the same person. Much of it is created based on the role and the people, but does anyone really know it all. For those that have someone that does...you are blessed. I know I am.
PS - Just to let you know..it could be as easy as a call (accidental or otherwise =p)

(baboom baboom baboom baboom)
Santa Baby, Just slip a sable under the tree
For me
Been an awful good girl
Santa Baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa baby, a '54 convertible too
Light blue
I'll wait up for you, dear
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Think of all the fun I've missed
Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed
Next year I could be just as good
If you'll check off my Christmas list
- Eartha Kitt - Santa Baby

Point to Ponder
how well do you know your friends?...how well do you know yourself?
Also - Do people find me intimidating?

Today has been a whirlwind day...
funny how one event can transcend and mean so many different things on so many different levels.
I learned a lot about myself today...and about the people around me.
I admit where i am wrong, funny how some people don't see it themselves.
I'm now gonna spend some time with those who mean a lot to me.

As a wrap up for today, my high points were having sushi with a friend and getting my camera (oh yeah!).
Low points...well...those are things i have to deal with.

It came upon the midnight clear,
That glorious song of old,
From angels bending near the earth,
To touch their harps of gold!
"Peace on the earth, good will to men,
From heaven's all gracious King!
The world in solemn stillness lay,
To hear the angels sing.
- various - It came upon the midnight clear

Point to Ponder
Already had a lot to think about today.

I should be sleeping..
instead I'm spending money again. =p Nothing too bad..but 20% off at dvd online and it was all over. Smallville, Buffy 4, X2, Scarface, and a couple others. Definitely a deal..but think i've been on a spending spree lately..and unfortunately still havent hit up anyone on my christmas list yet.
Ilan came back to work today...and it was just like old times...that mutherfucker =p. Its been kinda quiet the past few weeks while he's been on vacation...but once he got back...we started clowning on each other again. too funny.
Got to take care of a bunch of stuff at work, and got pre-approved on my home loan for more than i thought. WOW. Now its just a matter of finding a place.
Well...guess its time to crash. nite all.

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
Where the treetops glisten,
and children listen
To hear sleigh bells in the snow
- various - I'm dreaming of a white Christmas

Point to Ponder
Need to cut on spending. But yeah...RENT on TUES..and Producers sometime the week of dec 15. What to wear ...what to wear.

Action Packed Day...Return of the excitement
WOW..today was just really crazy. It started out with a late nite chiln and chatting with people. Some nice convos...but kept me up kinda late (why?- well..i was writing last nite's post). Woke up for my telephone meeting but passed out right after it. Got into work later than i wanted =p, but had to play catch-up most of the day. So..what happened that made it so action packed??

1. Stressed but bought tickets to see Rent on tues next week. Center area, mid balcony. I'm excited. Mantha and I may try to camp out for first two rows for another showing when she gets down here. (Sorry clint..didn't know u wanted to go in time..but remind me again when u see me..and i'll include you in producers- after dec 12).

2. I also planned on surprising a friend at her musical performance tonite. Unfortunately, I found out too late that the performance was sold out. The good part of it though was that I was still able to see some of her performance later that nite. It was cool...and good to see her smile (even though she says it was forced =p) Good job Bonnie.

3. Well...thinking that i would not be able to see Bonnie's performance, I decided to hang out with Brenda and go to the Lord of the Rings Premiere in Westwood. It was a lot of fun doing the star gazing. We "stalked" at the wrong theatre to see most of the celebrities walk by, but we did get some good looks at the stars of the movie. Got some close ups of stars that came to our corner including Dominic Monaghan (merry)..and to every girls delight Orlando Bloom (legolas...like u didn't know). I'll try to put pics up once i get them from Brenda. I hope they came out too.

4. Gave a call to Biggwould and he was still sober at a bar at 11:40pm. Shame dogg. Well..he called back i gave him a couple of recommendations as well. Have fun tonite and just be safe man. Look forward to seeing you again.

All in all it has been a good nite.

Happy Birthday Biggwould
Congrats Bonnie
Good luck Bonnie and Brenda on your finals.

Have yourself a merry little Christmas,
Let your heart be light
From now on,
our troubles will be out of sight

Have yourself a merry little Christmas,
Make the Yule-tide gay,
From now on,
our troubles will be miles away.
- various - Have yourself a merry little Christmas

Point to Ponder
Need to plan out the elementary school project. As well as sign up for the rebates.

Christmas coming too early...
Well...i did some crazy shopping today. I was planning on making a christmas wish list for myself...but unfortunately as soon as i think of something...i sometimes end up buying it. Here was the latest damage: Canon powershot sd10 and memory. Damn Dell and their discount coupons. I've been eye-ing the camera for some time now...just looking for a good price. Had to get the memory to qualify for the coupon. Then went off to buy Pirates DVD at best buys....ai ya...more money.
Congrats to Kelly and UCI Delta pledge class for crossing today. Hope to see you when i get out to future events.
Like i said..this month is looking really very artsy. Likely RENT next week, Producers once mantha gets back. I've also got the option of possibly Cirque de Soleil..but we'll have to see about that. This month is already moving quick. Talked with some friends about possibly going caroling..so that seems fun.

Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas,
Everywhere you go.
Take a look in the five and ten,
Glisten' once again,
With candy canes and silver lanes aglow.
Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas,
Toys in every store.
But the prettiest sight to see,
Is the holly that will be,i actu
On your own front door
- various - Its Beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Point to Ponder
If we decided to go caroling...where could we go to do so?

Feeling Musical?
In this whole return to self and creativity, I've decided to get back into musicals. Yeah...used to watch them all the time. Miss Saigon, Phantom of the Opera, Les Miserables, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat, Caberet...but I'd have to say my favorite and most under-appreciated is Starlight Express. Man..they did the whole thing on Roller Skates. Humm..just found out they'll be in OC after xmas.
Unfortunately so far I've passed up on RENT (to do some stupid techie thing) and Lion King (cus i was stuck at work).
Well....December could be the return. I've heard many good things about the Producers (i still love mel brooks comedies) and i just heard RENT WILL BE IN SoCal.
So..now I'm just waiting for mantha to come home (we had a good talk recently...have i told u how much i love my sister...well..prob not enough =p). I mentioned it to some family members so it may become a whole outing.
Personally just thinking of experiencing it with some nose bleed seats (hey..its xmas season), but if anyone is interested in see either Producers or RENT...let me know (comments, email, cell). I'm shooting for midweek evening performance. In LA or OC.

City sidewalks, busy sidewalks
Dressed in holiday style.
In the air
There's a feeling
of Christmas.

Children laughing
People passing
Meeting smile after smile
And on ev'ry street corner you'll hear,

Silver bells, silver bells
It's Christmas time in the city.
Ring-a-ling, hear them sing.
Soon it will be Christmas day.
- various - Silver Bells

Point to Ponder
Who wants to come to the show =p?