ai ya..another close one...hopefully i don't start to falter on this commitment (yeah...working out will start again after i finish that school project =p).

Today was really productive. I spent the early morning loading about 20 computers from the school and bringing them home for me to work on. Thank goodness for imaging software, cuz i'm going to have to reload all those computers with the standard software.
After picking up the machines, i got the call from Rico to hang out. We grabbed some lunch before deciding to head out to a movie. OMG, Lucille's in Long Beach. We killed this appetizer, that ending up getting me too full to really eat my meal. Overall though, it was really good. Suffered food coma thru most of the movie. Then when i got home, then i just passed out....

hence...almost missing this post (just woke up..its 2am)...

Well..i may head back to bed...or start working on these machines. Its only gonna be sunday..and expecting a short week, so may just get this done.

Silent night, holy night,
All is calm, all is bright
Round yon virgin mother and child.
Holy infant so tender and mild,
Sleep in heavenly peace.
Sleep in heavenly peace.
- various - Silent Night

Point to Ponder
Why does it seem like everyone is getting a Season Pass to Disneyland this year?

whoops...almost forgot to blog today.

work was ok...just did more cleaning around the office.

I've got my timeline for the elementary school project now..so gonna be pretty busy working on that. It was soo cool, i even got the email working...least internally. Well...gonna wake up early to start on that. I've got till Jan 4 to get it all together.

Chestnuts roasting on an open fire
Jack Frost nipping at your nose
Yuletide carols being sung by a choir
And folks dressed up like eskimos
- Various - The Christmas Song (Chestnuts roasting over an open fire)

Point to Ponder
What time will I wake up tomorrow?

The watch...the pager.
Another Christmas has passed.

For the most part...it was ok. Got stuck at work..then stuck in traffic. Hopefully won't repeat that when i have to work tomorrow.
Got some stuff done on my project..so that was cool. Actually went to church. Don't know if that was a good thing or not. Think that will be a "discussion" for another day...maybe tomorrow if i'm bored.

The act of gift giving has taken a new form for me. I truly believe its the thought that counts. I think it is more of the matter of actually being heard. I remember when i was in 8th grade, i wanted a swatch watch. why? well...in 8th grade, all the cool kids were wearing it. I asked and asked my parents and anyone to get me one ($85 was expensive back then), but no one ever got me one. Later on in high school, the object of "coolness" was a pager. Again, ask and ask...but in this case, not to receive. Guess the point of the matter was more than the actual object itself. As far as the watch is concerned, I saved up and bought it myself. In the case of the pager, i had enough and just bought it myself again. Even during that time, it wasn't really about the object...it was whether people were even listening.

Well... I learned a lot this season. The coolest gifts i got were the buffy season 5 from Brenda and the Bath and Body works from Alfred. It was too funny, Alfred even wrapped them all up and put it in a PacSun box. Shopping at Bath and Body is almost as awkward as a guy going to buy something from a Victoria's Secret store. Anyway, it really wasn't about the items...it was the fact that someone listened to me. I realize some of my most treasured gifts have been those where people were simply listening: Enida's Jaguar, Sam's Talking Boo, Sam and Will's Simpson Bowling shirt. For them and for those that do...I appreciate it more than you know.

The other thing i learned was my coworker Ilan. What he taught me was how to say Fuck It. yeah...i've know how to say that before =p, but truly it was a lesson in self assertion. Yeah i like to think of others, sometimes more than myself...well...now i'm just doing a little more of the latter. Does it sound selfish?...oh well...too bad. I'm looking to get more into a core for myself. My friends tell me i've been spreading myself too thin..well...now I'm just focusing on things. So..this Christmas day i actually spent with Rico. He's like a brother to me and has always been there, even though i never called him every week...or sometimes even for months. I've had enough people come and go in my life, now I'm just gonna focus on to those that mean more to me. I'm also gonna be more assertive and direct in general. Also being true to myself. Not trying to be cool, just being myself. Guess this means I'm growing up.

"When I was a child I spoke as a child I understood as a child I thought as a child;
but when I became a man I put away childish things." I Cor. xiii. 11.

Do you remember me?
I sat upon your knee
I wrote to you with childhood fantasies
Well I'm all grown up now
Can you still help somehow?
I'm not a child but my heart still can dream

So here's my lifeful wish
My grown up Christmas List
Not for myself
But for a world in need

No more lives torn apart
That wars will never start
And time will heal our hearts
Every man will have a friend
That right will always win
And love will never end
This is my grown up Christmas List
- various - My grown up Christmas List

Point to Ponder
You can hear me all day...but do you truly listen?
Something to think about over my starbucks coffee. =/

Man..and u thought i lived at work??? Practically.
I'm taking 2 weeks off in January for my Japan trip..so i didn't want to see like i was abusive and ask for Fri Dec 26 or Jan 2 off. Sucks when the holidays are on a Thursday, yet the next day is still a work day. I was thinking about taking fri off anyways, since I had to work on that school project, but my coworker (married with kids..) asked if he could take it for family stuff. So yes..i'll be in on Friday. Hopefully I'll take off early. I'd be gone right now if it wasn't for all the accidents and traffic on the freeways right now.
Well just want to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

People making lists, buying special gifts,
It's a time to be kind to one and all
It's that time of year when good friends are dear
And you wish you could give more
Than just presents from a store

Why don't you give love on Christmas day (on Christmas day)
Oh even the man who has everything
Would be so happy if you would bring
Him love on Christmas day (on Christmas day)
No greater gift is there than love
- Jackson 5 - Give love on Christmas day

Point to Ponder
How is next year gonna be different?

Oh..again...MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR ^_^

Took this quiz...pretty accurate and interesting.

You are Form 1, Goddess: The Creator.

"And The Goddess planted the acorn of life.
She cried a single tear and shed a single drop
of blood upon the earth where she buried it.
From her blood and tear, the acorn grew into
the world."

Some examples of the Goddess Form are Gaia (Greek),
Jehova (Christian), and Brahma (Indian).
The Goddess is associated with the concept of
creation, the number 1, and the element of
earth.
Her sign is the dawn sun.

As a member of Form 1, you are a charismatic
individual and people are drawn to you.
Although sometimes you may seem emotionally
distant, you are deeply in tune with other
people's feelings and have tremendous empathy.
Sometimes you have a tendency to neglect your
own self. Goddesses are the best friends to
have because they're always willing to help.


Which Mythological Form Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

The last of the shopping is over. Should be able to finish the wrapping tonite. Don't know if i can say i into the spirit yet...but oddly enough i keep singing these are a few of my favorite things as i walk thru target. I think the best moment of today was when my coworker opened my gift to her. As she unwrapped the paper and saw the exercise/fitness ball box, she faked a smile as she seemed thankful for the gift. She was checking the inside of the box for the instructional video tape as she found the real gift inside: tapes of christmas shows that she used to watch during her childhood. She was soo happy...and i think i was happier because of it. Both my coworkers got me gift certificates to places, since as some of you may know, i'm a bit difficult to shop for. =p
Had more to write, but been watching japanese dramas and my bro just came home. Still gotta work tomorrow...so i think i'll close out here.

Said the night wind to the little lamb,
Do you see what I see?
Way up in the sky, little lamb,
Do you see what I see?
A star, a star, dancing in the night
With a tail as big as a kite,
With a tail as big as a kite.
- various - Do you see what I see

Point to Ponder
Should I take Friday off?

Humm..last minute shopping..or LOTR again. We'll see what happens.
And since Brenda asked =p, plus i had been working on one...the wish list. Yes..i know..3 days before xmas...I'm not expecting anything..really. But here are some things I've been eyeing.

The wish list. Also added to side panel for ur convenience =p.

I broke my bat on Johnny's head,
Somebody snitched on me.
I hid a frog in sister's bed,
Somebody snitched on me.
I spilled some ink on Mommy's rug,
I made Tommy eat a bug,
Bought some gum with a penny slug,
Somebody snitched on me.

Oh, I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas,
Mommy and Daddy are mad,
I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas,
'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad.
- various, I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas

Point to Ponder
LOTR or Crazy malls?

Getting most of the christmas shopping done...and oddly getting sleep as well. Hoping to get done soon...prob do some shopping during my lunch break. The holiday kickback (yes maureen, i know.. kickback..not party) last nite was cool, nice seeing everyone again. i don't know...got me thinking again. glue i tell u. I started looking to myself to see where i fit in. I don't blame anyone, and i don't want to sit here and wallow in self-pity. Funny, how growing up i always felt i was the social outcast (well..i was)..and how i always wanted to be the popular one...the irony now. I talked to joe today and he was saying how he was amazed that i actually know the 200+ people in friendster, whereas i told him i rather envied the 40 closer friends he had. I don't know...maybe a change is needed i guess....something different. Oddly enough I got a friendster message from one of my friends from wayy back in elementary school. Back when i had only a "core" set of friends. Think it might be time to get back to my roots...or branch out entirely to something new. I know i just need a change. I feel like I'm stagnating.

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And auld lang syne?

CHORUS:
For auld lang syne, my dear,
For auld lang syne,
We'll tak a cup of kindness yet,
For auld lang syne!
- various - Auld Lang Syne

Point to Ponder
I think i'm needed an "Its a Wonderful Life" moment.

Got some of the christmas shopping done today...and a good idea for the rest. Overall just a fun day chilln with my nerdy sis *sniff..hee hee...gryffindor.* Got a cha cha lesson and fought off hordes of people at the mall. I never remembered it being this crazy. Oh well..got some of the harder to find items...so hopefully tomorrow will be easier. In the meantime, off to the kick back. Kinda tired...but figured i'd post this now before i forget later.

Deck the halls with boughs of holly,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
Tis the season to be jolly,
Fa la la la la, la la la la.
- various - Deck the Halls

Point to Ponder
When am i gonna wrap all this stuff??

Today was cool, got to wrap up most of my work responsibilities. The next few weeks will be relatively quiet as well, since most of the people will be off on vacation. This is great timing, since i need to gear up and finish the school network. For right now though, i need to focus on christmas shopping this weekend. Dang, only a couple more days till christmas...and i haven't had time to think about much. Planning on chilling after the xmas shopping headache at Maureen's lil kick back.
Tonite I attended the Laker-Nuggets game. Box Seats courtesy of Staples, since i won the office raffle earlier last week. The select 4 of us we able to chill in this little lounge room for the game. It was really cool and I had fun. The game itself..i don't know. I start to wonder about professional sports...cuz it just didn't seem to have the energy..or passion. Seems really choreographed and had no fluidity. Carmello Anthony made for a good show..but of course...the man you can never keep down...definitely made his mark. The Lakers, after blowing a 10 and sometimes 15 point lead throughout the game, got tied up in the last 2 secs. The final fade away made by the player that almost wasn't there due to his court case in Colorado...of course..Kobe Bryant. Hey...i'm always down for a good ball game...and the boy's got skill....but for some reason...i still can't see myself as a laker fan. I respect the game....but its gotta be something special to appreciate the whole team.(Lakers of the 80's...Showtime....that was a team).



Hark! The herald angels sing,
'Glory to the new born King;
Peace on earth and mercy mild,
God and sinners reconciled.
Joyful, all ye nations rise,
Join the triumph of the sky;
With th'angelic host proclaim,
'Christ is born in Bethlehem!'
- various - Hark! The herald angels sing

Point to Ponder
Why do people kiss under the mistletoe?

Ahh...finally some time to relax and think about a blog again. Ahh...let me finish with what i was going to say a couple days ago.
Soooo... I was talking to a friend online and she was telling me how she was having "issues" with her relationship. Nothing too unusual, but it made me sad, since i really care about this girl. In the past, I was willing to do pretty much anything for her, but the feelings weren't mutual as she did not want a long distance relationship (she's from Norcal). There was one point when i drove up 7 hours to Davis just to see her, all the while questioning why i would even do this for anyone...when i wasn't sure if she felt the same. Oddly enough, all those questions subsided when i saw her that night. Well...she has always been honest with me...and although we didn't pursue a relationship...the friendship has always been there.

Anyways, during that whole time, I could never really tell her how i felt. I was at a point when i wanted to tell her that i loved her, but couldn't say the words...cuz i wasn't sure how she felt. I always felt that before I could say that...it would have to be mutual. I guess that stems from a misconception about love.

Its a scary word...i know it. Many people fear it...or are constantly pursuing it, when in reality, its just a word.

One of the good things i took from Matrix Revolutions (and there were only a few), was an understanding that Love is but a word...but is signifies something more...a connection. The connection is what is meaningful, and goes beyond definition. Another idea taken Love Actually, is that Love is all around us...and the stories intertwined in the movie show the different types of love. Funny huh...one word with so many different interpretations.
I guess thats what i've learned so far in my life. I'd been seeking this unattainable love/connection...when all the while i already had it. Now once i find that special person that takes it to a higher level, then that will be something to write more about.

...cant you see...im not perfect...
and my journey isnt to find the perfect person.
i'm trying to find an imperfect person and love them in a perfect way...
-Taken from a friends away message



Last Christmas
I gave you my heart
But the very next day you gave it away
This year
To save me from tears
I'll give it to someone special

Once bitten and twice shy
I keep my distance
But you still catch my eye
Tell me baby
Do you recognize me?
Well
It's been a year
It doesn't surprise me
I wrapped it up and sent it
With a note saying "I love you"
I meant it
Now I know what a fool I've been
But if you kissed me now
I know you'd fool me again
- wham - Last Christmas

Point to Ponder
Why was the google search i did on love consist primarily on webpages with religious undertones?

Almost made through today. woke up, but got on that call late this morning. Have to visit the site in pasadena tomorrow, but just felling tired all day. Gonna take a nap now...and maybe add more to this post...but usually once i go to sleep..its over.

*later edit - Nope...didn't wake up =p

Silent night, holy night,
All is calm, all is bright
Round yon virgin mother and child.
Holy infant so tender and mild,
Sleep in heavenly peace.
Sleep in heavenly peace.
- various - Silent Night

Point to Ponder
Wonder if I'll have the patience to read LOTR now that i've seen all the movies?

Gonna make this brief. Most of the way through this busy week.
Had a luncheon as a thanks for all the work i've done...personally just doing what i felt i needed to do...but nice all the same. Right after that got stuck working on email issues for the next 3 hours..ugh
Got to see the producers...and i think it was really fun. Had a good time there, before mantha and i raced off to see Return of the King. That too was great. Bunch of friends came out for that as well. Actually got Rico out there..and haven't seen him in soo long. And Quyen was out there too =)
Well..its now 5am (yeah...still considering it part of my tues)...and i have a office phone call at 8am...so i think i'll crash now. Only thing left for this week is Laker game on Friday...and maybe rent again on thurs...
Oh well..nite.

When I'm worried and I can't sleep
I count my blessings instead of sheep
And I fall asleep
Counting my blessings
- Bing Crosby, White Christmas - Count Your Blessings Instead Of Sheep

Point to Ponder
Should i even sleep? I hope i wake up.

Arrgg. I hate dealing with stupid people. I woke up and was immediately made angry by someone from verizon. Hard to believe all the trouble i'm getting into to just to have them extend their own telephone line. "we don't do that in this department, call here." "You'll need to call the provider and get them to authorize." and of course, my favorite, "We don't talk to end-users (being me)". Right after that I get the sales guy for the telephone service provider for my office, trying to sell me a new system, when i don't make those decisions...my corporate office does. All of this, plus some plans i needed for our new office made for quite a busy day.
On a good note, in the car ride over, i was able to start drafting a list of people i want to buy for...as well as a xmas list for myself of things. Lately I haven't really been desiring much (and what i have...i've already bought)...but then again i don't want for find old gift certificates never redeemed or things i don't use...so i'll make a list.
I had a post that i wanted to include in here...but instead i just sat and talked to my sister. I'll prob save it for tomorrow.

Someday at Christmas men won't be boys
Playing with bombs like kids play with toys
One warm December our hearts will see
A world where men are free

Someday at Christmas there'll be no wars
When we have learned what Christmas is for
When we have found what life's really worth
There'll be peace on earth
- Stevie Wonder - Someday at Christmas

Point to Ponder
The song always sounded cool...but didn't realize its undertones. Guess it is appropriate considering current world situation.

Christmas season is here..and i'm not quite ready. Did something despite being hurt...and i almost made it thru it...but didn't quite. I tried to be the bigger person...but couldn't stop the anger/hurt in my heart. Again makes it even worse when they don't even know. My consolation is that mantha is back.
Started looking at the pics from Mark's party...it was fun...but yeah...i don't think i'll keep that camera.

O Holy Night
The stars are brightly shining
It is the night of our dear Savior's birth
Long lay the world in sin and error pining
Till he appeared
And the soul felt its worth
The thrill of hope
The weary world rejoices
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn
Fall on your knees
O hear the angel voices
O night divine
O night when Christ was born
O night divine
O night, o night divine
- various - O Holy Night

Point to Ponder
Can i really get into J-music...when i don't understand it? Sometimes music transcends languages.

Caught up on movies today...Last Samurai and Somethings got to give. That and sleep pretty much occupied my day. Should be working on the School server...but guess that will have to wait for tomorrow. Busy week ahead...Producers on tues, LOTR on Wed 1am, Laker game on Fri...and maybe Rent again on Thurs. Somehow gotta figure when I'll finish the school project. Well..i'll think about that tomorrow....got a meeting at noon i don't want to miss. Plus mantha is driving home today as well. woohoo.

Think of your fellow man
Lend him a helping hand
Put a little love in your heart
You see it's getting late
Oh, please don't hesitate
Put a little love in your heart

And the world will be a better place
And the world will be a better place
For you and me
You just wait and see
- various - Put a little love in your heart

Point to Ponder
What is missing in my life?

Just getting back from Mark/Ed/Alan's party. It was fun. I had a lot to think about during the day..and i'm just thankful for friends like Vivian and Ilan to kinda keep me grounded. It was great seeing everyone again. As for right now, I think I'm just gonna hit the sack. Nite.

Just hear those sleigh bells jing - a - ling
Ring - ting - ting - a - ling too
It's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you
Outside the snow is fallin
And friends are calling you
It's lovely weather for a sleigh ride together with you

Let's have a very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year (a happy new year)
Give with love and joy and happiness
And lots of good cheer
I want you to have
A very merry Christmas
And a happy New Year ( a happy new year)
Filled with love and joy and happiness
And lots of good cheers
- TLC - Sleigh Ride

Point to Ponder
Why to i get attached so easily?

Today was a crazy and hectic day. I got into a meeting for planning the new office. I think i held my own somewhat, but there was a lot of things that just went over my head.
After that i sat on the phone all day...trying to talk to telephone companies. One to run a line to our office (that should have been done a month ago) and the other to transfer an existing phone number to a new phone. Thought it was easy?? HECK NO.
It was for my boss, so you know it had to be done. He got a new phone and assumed it would just transfer over easy. yeah..i was thinking that the whole 2 hours i was on hold with ATT. Supposedly of all the companies, they have been the worse. Course..i'll prob be switching to T-mobile in March..when my contract finishes...so hopefully all the "technical" difficulties will be solved by then. Anyways, I called again from home and fortunately got thru. Unfortunately, once they got all the information, their system went down for maintenance. ARRGG. Oh well, we'll see what happens tomorrow.
I'm glad that my work loves me...course since i love working there. They are having a luncheon in my honor next week, for all the work i've done. Funny, i just do what i have to do. I was happy when my coworker got mad that i had been on the phone for soo long...cuz she didn't think it was all worth it. They are all great and I've been very fortunate. Crazy thing too...we had gotten 4 tickets to the VIP box at the Staples Center for the Lakers-Nuggets game next week Dec 19. We had an office drawing and I was one of the lucky 4. Oh yeah...thats gonna be fun.
Just doing clean up stuff...office, room, life. Still disappointed with that Canon camera...and now on another search for a good camera (still testing to compare). I don't know what it is about the sony camera that takes such clear pics. May look into the DSC-P92. Depending how if i go back to sony could also alter my cell phone plans. Well...either way, it won't be till next year for that anyways. Sony p900 or Nokia 6230.

O little town of Bethlehem
How still we see thee lie
Above thy deep and dreamless sleep
The silent stars go by
Yet in thy dark streets shineth
The everlasting Light
The hopes and fears of all the years
Are met in thee tonight
- various - O little town of Bethlehem

Point to Ponder
What digi-camera??? arrgg

Grrr...disappointed in the canon camera. Prob gonna return it since i don't like how the pics are coming out. Also found my next mobile phone...but have to wait till next year before it comes out. Well..cube seems to get jealous since i have to sit in a high chair to use the computer now, so I'll have to try to do these during the day or so. Anyways..i'm out. Nite.

The first Noel, the angels did say
Was to certain poor shepherds in fields as they lay
In fields where they lay keeping their sheep
On a cold winter's night that was so deep
Noël, Noël, Noël, Noël
Born is the King of Israel!
- various - The first Noel

Point to Ponder
Trista and Ryan married...but why did all the other reality couples start breaking up?

Not much going on today. Got to see RENT and i did enjoy it. Unlike Miss Saigon, i kept from listening to the soundtrack and stuff so that i could be surprised when i saw it...and it was good. Not sure if i'll see it again, since i found out Starlight express will be around in Feb as well. Been spending quite a bit, on the theater alone. Not sure how "impressed" i am with this camera. Seems to give everyone demon Red-eye or come out blurry. I'll have to do more test shots and see if i can get better with it. Oh well...nite. Got a call in the morning.

Let it snow, let it snow
Let it snow on me
Hey, it's another Christmas holiday
It's a joyous thing
Let the angels sing
'Cause we're together
We got a thing can't let it slip away
Go outside it's raining sleet
When our bodies meet
I don't care about the weather
- BoysIIMen - Let it snow

Point to Ponder
Should I see Rent again..or save for Starlight express?

Was still thinking about the "doing too much" comments i got earlier. Decided to call up one of my homeboys that i haven't talked to in a while, Al. We kinda share the same mentality on stuff....you'll rest when your dead. Yeah.. I know it sounds very dramatic...but its been our philosophy. I've sat at home at times..and just bored out of my mind. The one quarter i "took it easy" was the quarter i did the worst in...while the quarter i overdid it with 25 units and had no time for anything...was the only quarter i got on deans list. I guess it helps keep me focused in some sense (doesn't that sound ironic...doing too much to keep focus?). I guess it just gave me no time to wander...
Al on the other hand is keeping himself busy with like 2+ jobs, school, girlfriend, family..u name it. So much so he hasn't had much time to kick it with me =p. But its ok..we still know we got each others back...
I guess thats what it comes down to. I always have to have something going on. Even now as i type this blog...i've got Pirates playing in the background (BEST movie of the summer).
Well...the houses in the neighborhood are all lit up in the xmas spirit. Some people when all out with motorized reindeer and snowmen. I'm sorta feeling the christmas spirit myself...but also feel stifled. Actually wish i had my own home to decorate. Where i live is ok, but i feel more like a tenant than anything else. Now its just a matter of finding where i want to live.

Sleigh bells ring
Are you listening
In the lane
Snow is glistening
A beautiful sight
We're happy tonight
Walking in a winter wonderland

Gone away is the bluebird
Here to stay is a new bird
He sings a love song
As we go along
Walking in a winter wonderland.
- Lonestar - Winter Wonderland

Point to Ponder
People are already asking me what i want for xmas. Dang..i need to make my 2 lists soon...who to buy for..and what i may want. =p

Today was a pretty lax day. Caught up on sleep and dropped off the computers at the school. Didn't really do much, but i guess it will give me a chance to focus for this week. RENT on Tues... plus an office visitor thursday or friday. Glad the computers are out...so gives me a chance to clean up around my room. Basically doing the same at the office as well. Seems a lil symbolic.
(PS - This would have posted on time, but loss internet connection. Sorry..i'd like to keep consistent with this commitment, since i've been lagging on the working out.)

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells swing and jingle bells ring
Snowin' and blowin' up bushels of fun
Now the jingle hop has begun

Jingle bell, jingle bell, jingle bell rock
Jingle bells chime in jingle bell time
Dancin' and prancin' in Jingle Bell Square
In the frosty air

What a bright time, it's the right time
To rock the night away
Jingle bell time is a swell time
To go glidin' in a one-horse sleigh
- Bobby Rydell - Jingle Bell Rock

Point to Ponder
When am i going to work out again?

I'm tired (sun 4.30am)
As I was setting up to write a this entry i "accidentally" called a friend. Circumstances aside, it was a really good conversation, learning more about her and myself in the process. Tonite was also the nite of the CRA office Xmas party. I'd have to say what i learned from both of these things today that there is nothing wrong with just being me. Many times i find myself changing to meet what other "expect" of me. Now in every instance, i'm still being myself (i hate people that are fake). I just am a multi-facited individual (wow...big word even at 4am) that only chooses to show what part of me would make the other person most comfortable. I tend to wonder is if that is all that they think i am.
APO Ray, Work Ray, Family Ray, Friend Ray....all different sides...all the same person. Much of it is created based on the role and the people, but does anyone really know it all. For those that have someone that does...you are blessed. I know I am.
PS - Just to let you know..it could be as easy as a call (accidental or otherwise =p)

(baboom baboom baboom baboom)
Santa Baby, Just slip a sable under the tree
For me
Been an awful good girl
Santa Baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa baby, a '54 convertible too
Light blue
I'll wait up for you, dear
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Think of all the fun I've missed
Think of all the fellas that I haven't kissed
Next year I could be just as good
If you'll check off my Christmas list
- Eartha Kitt - Santa Baby

Point to Ponder
how well do you know your friends?...how well do you know yourself?
Also - Do people find me intimidating?

Today has been a whirlwind day...
funny how one event can transcend and mean so many different things on so many different levels.
I learned a lot about myself today...and about the people around me.
I admit where i am wrong, funny how some people don't see it themselves.
I'm now gonna spend some time with those who mean a lot to me.

As a wrap up for today, my high points were having sushi with a friend and getting my camera (oh yeah!).
Low points...well...those are things i have to deal with.

It came upon the midnight clear,
That glorious song of old,
From angels bending near the earth,
To touch their harps of gold!
"Peace on the earth, good will to men,
From heaven's all gracious King!
The world in solemn stillness lay,
To hear the angels sing.
- various - It came upon the midnight clear

Point to Ponder
Already had a lot to think about today.

I should be sleeping..
instead I'm spending money again. =p Nothing too bad..but 20% off at dvd online and it was all over. Smallville, Buffy 4, X2, Scarface, and a couple others. Definitely a deal..but think i've been on a spending spree lately..and unfortunately still havent hit up anyone on my christmas list yet.
Ilan came back to work today...and it was just like old times...that mutherfucker =p. Its been kinda quiet the past few weeks while he's been on vacation...but once he got back...we started clowning on each other again. too funny.
Got to take care of a bunch of stuff at work, and got pre-approved on my home loan for more than i thought. WOW. Now its just a matter of finding a place.
Well...guess its time to crash. nite all.

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
Where the treetops glisten,
and children listen
To hear sleigh bells in the snow
- various - I'm dreaming of a white Christmas

Point to Ponder
Need to cut on spending. But yeah...RENT on TUES..and Producers sometime the week of dec 15. What to wear ...what to wear.

Action Packed Day...Return of the excitement
WOW..today was just really crazy. It started out with a late nite chiln and chatting with people. Some nice convos...but kept me up kinda late (why?- well..i was writing last nite's post). Woke up for my telephone meeting but passed out right after it. Got into work later than i wanted =p, but had to play catch-up most of the day. So..what happened that made it so action packed??

1. Stressed but bought tickets to see Rent on tues next week. Center area, mid balcony. I'm excited. Mantha and I may try to camp out for first two rows for another showing when she gets down here. (Sorry clint..didn't know u wanted to go in time..but remind me again when u see me..and i'll include you in producers- after dec 12).

2. I also planned on surprising a friend at her musical performance tonite. Unfortunately, I found out too late that the performance was sold out. The good part of it though was that I was still able to see some of her performance later that nite. It was cool...and good to see her smile (even though she says it was forced =p) Good job Bonnie.

3. Well...thinking that i would not be able to see Bonnie's performance, I decided to hang out with Brenda and go to the Lord of the Rings Premiere in Westwood. It was a lot of fun doing the star gazing. We "stalked" at the wrong theatre to see most of the celebrities walk by, but we did get some good looks at the stars of the movie. Got some close ups of stars that came to our corner including Dominic Monaghan (merry)..and to every girls delight Orlando Bloom (legolas...like u didn't know). I'll try to put pics up once i get them from Brenda. I hope they came out too.

4. Gave a call to Biggwould and he was still sober at a bar at 11:40pm. Shame dogg. Well..he called back i gave him a couple of recommendations as well. Have fun tonite and just be safe man. Look forward to seeing you again.

All in all it has been a good nite.

Happy Birthday Biggwould
Congrats Bonnie
Good luck Bonnie and Brenda on your finals.

Have yourself a merry little Christmas,
Let your heart be light
From now on,
our troubles will be out of sight

Have yourself a merry little Christmas,
Make the Yule-tide gay,
From now on,
our troubles will be miles away.
- various - Have yourself a merry little Christmas

Point to Ponder
Need to plan out the elementary school project. As well as sign up for the rebates.

Christmas coming too early...
Well...i did some crazy shopping today. I was planning on making a christmas wish list for myself...but unfortunately as soon as i think of something...i sometimes end up buying it. Here was the latest damage: Canon powershot sd10 and memory. Damn Dell and their discount coupons. I've been eye-ing the camera for some time now...just looking for a good price. Had to get the memory to qualify for the coupon. Then went off to buy Pirates DVD at best buys....ai ya...more money.
Congrats to Kelly and UCI Delta pledge class for crossing today. Hope to see you when i get out to future events.
Like i said..this month is looking really very artsy. Likely RENT next week, Producers once mantha gets back. I've also got the option of possibly Cirque de Soleil..but we'll have to see about that. This month is already moving quick. Talked with some friends about possibly going caroling..so that seems fun.

Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas,
Everywhere you go.
Take a look in the five and ten,
Glisten' once again,
With candy canes and silver lanes aglow.
Its beginning to look a lot like Christmas,
Toys in every store.
But the prettiest sight to see,
Is the holly that will be,i actu
On your own front door
- various - Its Beginning to look a lot like Christmas

Point to Ponder
If we decided to go caroling...where could we go to do so?

Feeling Musical?
In this whole return to self and creativity, I've decided to get back into musicals. Yeah...used to watch them all the time. Miss Saigon, Phantom of the Opera, Les Miserables, Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dream Coat, Caberet...but I'd have to say my favorite and most under-appreciated is Starlight Express. Man..they did the whole thing on Roller Skates. Humm..just found out they'll be in OC after xmas.
Unfortunately so far I've passed up on RENT (to do some stupid techie thing) and Lion King (cus i was stuck at work).
Well....December could be the return. I've heard many good things about the Producers (i still love mel brooks comedies) and i just heard RENT WILL BE IN SoCal.
So..now I'm just waiting for mantha to come home (we had a good talk recently...have i told u how much i love my sister...well..prob not enough =p). I mentioned it to some family members so it may become a whole outing.
Personally just thinking of experiencing it with some nose bleed seats (hey..its xmas season), but if anyone is interested in see either Producers or RENT...let me know (comments, email, cell). I'm shooting for midweek evening performance. In LA or OC.

City sidewalks, busy sidewalks
Dressed in holiday style.
In the air
There's a feeling
of Christmas.

Children laughing
People passing
Meeting smile after smile
And on ev'ry street corner you'll hear,

Silver bells, silver bells
It's Christmas time in the city.
Ring-a-ling, hear them sing.
Soon it will be Christmas day.
- various - Silver Bells

Point to Ponder
Who wants to come to the show =p?

I got back to the gym today. It felt good. Tried to get some of my other stuff done as well, but didn't really get a chance to. The odd part of today was actually catching the movie ZAPPED on tv. It brought me back many childhood memories (and fantasies). It also started me on a nostalgia trip when i heard the music. My new mission it to find some of these old movie soundtracks. That plus watching The Last Dragon the nite before. wow..just found the Last Dragon soundtrack on amazon...coool. =)

So..if anyone with music shares or a large collection of MP3s, I'll be eternally indebted to you if you can accomplish the following task.
I want to get the soundtracks for the following movies The Last Dragon (found, just now), Zapped, and The Cutting Edge. Zapped is likely to be remade soon..so hoping the soundtrack will as well. But i did find the song list in case "someone" happens to run across it in an mp3. Cutting Edge is probably on CD as well, just out of print. So...here is the song list *hint, hint*, otherwise I'll just have to check out local stores.

Zapped song list
The Cutting Edge song list.

Take me to your heart
Show me where to start
Let me play the part
Of your first love
All the stars are right
Every wish is ours to make
My love

[Chorus]
Got to believe in magic
Tell me how 2 people find each other
In a world that's full of strangers
Got to believe in magic
Somethings stronger than than the moon above
'Coz it's magic when 2 people fall in love
Pity those who wait

Trust in love to fate
Finding out too late
That they've lost it
Never letting go
They will never know
The ways of love
[repeat chorus]
- David Pomeranz - Got to believe in magic
Sounds a lot better if someone can find the song.

Point to Ponder
Thinking about Christmas Caroling...wonder where i can do that?

I really wasn't too sure about today. I felt a sense of disappointment and loneliness...well...at least thats how the morning started. I had planned a BBQ with my friends from Ventura, but never really was sure how many people were coming...or even if any were. Add to that just feeling down the past days...from just sitting at home and being alone.
Well..thankfully all that changed around 2pm. Sharon came over with her korean bbq and that basically started my day. The boys (Edward and Bren) were on their way over...so the bbq was definitely a go. Sharon and I hit up a Korean market, and we just bought loads of supplies for the afternoon. When we all got back to my house, we all pitched in and helped set up and cook the meal. It was actually a lot of fun. Korean BBQ, assorted sashimi, rice drink...yeah. We all ate to full. Maureen and Veronica even came over before heading out to Riverside. After dinner we headed out to watch elf. I think that movie is starting to put me in a holiday mood as well. Anyways, it was a really good day, so I'm just gonna leave it at that.

I really can't stay
But, baby, it's cold outside
I got to go way
But. baby, it's cold outside
This evening's has been
Been hoping that you'd drop in
So very nice
I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice
My mother will start to worry
Beautiful, what's your hurry
And father will be pacing the floor
Listen to the fireplace roar
So really I'd better scurry
Beautiful, please don't hurry
Maybe just a half a drink more
Put some records on while I pour
- Ella Fitzgerald - Baby Its cold outside

Point to Ponder
Need to find some good christmas music. Actually thinking more adult contemporary (Harry Connick Jr, Frank Sinatra)

When i make a commitment, I do my best to keep to it. Kinda tired right now, but I definitely wanted to make my post for today. Unfortunately, my other commitment of working out is faltering right now (don't' count me out... I may just make it today).
Didn't do the shopping run or anything, and didn't even leave the house. Occupied myself with my elementary school project. Getting quite a bit done on it. Setting the New Years deadline for myself to complete it all. Got a call from a friend that really made my day, since i was feeling a bit down. Otherwise, things have been somewhat busy...so thats good.

Tonight, we're all alone tonight,
Theres never been a moment
That trembles like tonight.
I read ur eyes tonight,
I see a love I always known
From another time
That once again is mine,

I need to know
Are u real?
Do u feel the way I feel?
Could u love?
Like I love you
Say u can and
Say u do

{chorus 1}
Say you'll stay,
Say your sure,
Say my heart was made for yours.
Let our love lead the way
Say you'll stay (say you'll stay).
- Kai - Say You'll Stay

Point to Ponder
How do I look at the world?

Happy Thanksgiving
Spent today chilln with family in Montebello. It was nice catching up with my cousins and just relaxing. We mostly played video games and taboo, but definately time well spent. Afterwards I headed out to Rico's house for dinner. Didn't stay too long, but it was good seeing him again as well. Ate my fair share of turkey today..and even though i felt like working out...unfortunately 24 hour fitness isn't open today. Debating on waking up early tomorrow for the sales, but don't really have anything i need/want to buy. I guess thats why i tend to save pretty well. I just make due with what I have. But if i do see anything I do want, I tend to spare no expense.
Thinking about exploring more of my creative writing side. These daily posts are ok...but I'm exploring my more creative side. I'll let u know what comes of it. Well..time to get some work done.
Happy Thanksgiving all.

If I feel off tomorrow would you still love me?
If I didn't smell so good would you still hug me?
If I got locked up and sentenced to a quarter century,
Could I count on you to be there to support me mentally?
If I went back to a hoopty from a Benz, would you poof and disappear like
some of my friends?
If I was hit and I was hurt would you be by my side?
If it was time to put in work would you be down to ride?
I'd get out and peel a nigga cap and chill and drive
I'm asking questions to find out how you feel inside
If I ain't rap 'cause I flipped burgers at Burger King
would you be ashamed to tell your friends you feelin' me?
And in bed if I used to my tongue, would you like that?
If I wrote you a love letter would you write back?
Now we can have a lil' drink you know a nightcap
And we could go do what you like, I know you like that
- 50 cent - 21 questions

Point to Ponder
Should I go shopping tomorrow morning? ugg..we'll see how long i stay up tonite.

Watching too many movies over these past days. Gothika, The Haunted House, The Missing and now Bad Santa. Guess I'm just catching up...even though only Gothika was good.
I brought some work home with me as well, as I'm going to be setting up the elementary school soon. At least my office is looking cleaner.=)
Anyways...gonna have Thanksgiving with my cousins. Hope the family up in Davis will be having fun as well. Happy Thanksgiving.

On that sunny day
Didn’t know I’d meet
Such a beautiful girl walkin’ down the street
Seen those bright brown eyes
With tears comin’ down (so he said to himself)
She deserves a crown
But where is it now
Momma listen
...
(Guys)
It feels like sumthins heatin up
can leave wit you

ladies

(Ladies)
I don’t know what I’m thinking bout
really leavin wit you

gentlemen goodnite
ladies good morning
hahahahaha
and that’s it
- Justin Timberlake - Senorita

Point to Ponder
What do I want for Christmas? Think i better work on a list.

Today was mostly catch up at work. Had to take care of a couple things that happened while I was out on Monday. It was nice seeing everyone again as well cleaning up a lot of my office. I'm not the neatest of people, but once i get to organizing things, watch out. Paid some bills. Eh..pretty uneventful day.
Changed up the workout routine a little thanks to Joe's advice. We'll see if it makes any difference. Well...got a early morning call, so i think i'll crash. Sorry...nothing really profound today....and too late to think of anything

Now what's cooler than bein' cool?
(ICE COLD!) I can't hear ya'
I say what's cooler than bein' cool?
(ICE COLD!) whooo...
Alright, alright, alright, alright
Alright, alright, alright, alright
Alright, alright, alright, alright
Alright, alright, alright, Ok now ladies, (YEAH!)
And we gon' break this back down in just a few seconds
Now don't have me break this thang down for nothin'
Now I wanna see y'all on y'all baddest behavior
Gimme some suga', I am your neighbor ahh here we go!
Shake it, shake, shake it, shake it (OHH OH)
Shake it, shake it, shake, shake it, shake it, shake it (OHH OH)
Shke it, shake it like a Poloroid Picture, shake it, shake it
Shh you got to, shake it, shh shake it, shake it, got to shake it
(Shake it Suga') shake it like a Poloroid Picture
- Outkast - Hey Ya

Point to Ponder
Now that the telephone portability is possible. What service and phone should i go with? I've been looking at t-mobile and this nokia 7250(i).

I dont know if i ever will retire.
I took 2 days off this week, Fri and Mon, but found myself working throughout the weekend. So i decided that Monday I would just relax. Nothing planned...and i was bored out of my mind. Sure I had things to do...but just didn't feel like doing it. Took care of a couple of stuff, but never changed out of my pjs. Tried to get back into video games...and honestly just couldn't do it. Soo boring..and I felt soo unproductive. So...i decided to go back to sleep.
When i work up, hit the gym for a 30min run, then chilled with my cousin to watch Gothika. Had a couple of good jumps here and there...and overall a good movie. This might be the thriller/ghost weekend with Haunted Mansion opening up this week as well....although the only scary thing about that movie is that Eddie Murphy is in it.
Oh..and congrats to Nea and Dave on finding your home. Can't wait till the housewarming =)

Where is thumbkin?
Where is thumbkin?
Here I am (Bring right hand out from behind your back with thumb up)
Here I am (Bring left hand out from behind your back with thumb up)
How are you today, sir? (Bend right thumb as if talking)
Very well, I thank you. (Bend left thumb as if talking back.)
Run away, (Put right hand behind your back.)
Run away. (Put left hand behind your back.)
- Learning song - Where is thumbkin?
odd - I just searched this since i heard a comedian on Conan talk about it. Never knew it was a song to learn about your fingers...humm..thats something to think about.

Point to Ponder
who created the cotton gin? and why of all the numerous facts we learned in elementary school..we still remember that one?
Ps. I really don't know what is up with all the nursery rhyme stuff? Think i'll need to see what tomorrows post will be and find something more modern.

brr..its getting cold.
Its been a long day..so i'll try to keep this short.
This weekend was supposed to be relaxing, but i had to coordinate the power shutdowns for AU and LA. So this morning i got the phone call to run into the office and turn everything back on. Unfortunately I missed the noon meeting i wanted to attend in anaheim.
Well, thanks to fiona's requests, i decided to trek down to SD for their general meeting. I've been really impressed with the SD chapter and wanted to just visit with friends there. Well, after visiting with Grace, Annie, Fiona, Catherine, Christina, Daryl, and meeting new peeps at the chapter...I tried to call up some family and friends. In the end, i just drove back to LA and hit the gym. Trying to push harder at that now as well....also thinking about expanding this aspect of myself in writing. I mean...how boring can my life to write about it day by day. Couple things I'm thinking about in the works...but you'll just have to see that when it comes.
Well..no work tomorrow..so hoping to take care of some stuff. Nite all.

Hush, little baby, don't say a word
Mama's gonna buy you a mockin'bird

If that mockin'bird don't sing
Mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring

If that diamond ring turns brass,
Mama's gonna buy you a looking glass
- Southern Lullaby - Hush Little Baby

Point to Ponder
What does cardio exercise actually do for you? (yes..besides the obvious...work your heart)

yeah..this post is really late (2.45am) but since its still the end of my saturday..it qualifies as sat post.
Today went mostly ok...had to make sure i was awake to do the power shutdown, but i ended up hitting snooze for 40min. Good thing i set it up early. Did go and get my McGriddle (the sausage one is the better one) and successfully took care of that task.
Started watching the USC/UCLA game..and ohh..it was ugly. From the first touchdown were the ucla guy look like he hit a brick wall...to some of those bullet passes to Mike Williams...DAMN. So..I know Mary (USC) had a good day =). I will eventually have to check out one of those tailgates you throw...but we'll see.
Well..got a call from Al before i took a nap, so we were just looking to chill for the nite. I was thinking of hitting century club for this new group "take 6" from the members of Kai and Interlude but wasn't too sure if i was up to it. I've made it a point to myself try not to hit the clubs unless i go with girls...cuz if i don't, i end up being a wall flower. (no fun). Well...Sat was also the day of the APO-Phil of Greater Los Angeles (APO-GLA) Thanksgiving day awards nite. I had gotten to meet some of the members at some of our events, the APO-Phil Alumni meeting in SD, as well as Nationals. Well...I've been looking to be more involved in my Philippine culture and figured this could be a good way to do so. Plus I had to be out in Westwood later that nite, because LA was also going to have emergency power testing.
The evening was fun and very much felt like a Filipino party. Everyone there was like auntie and uncle. It was nice. After the party I headed to the office, figuring I'd just jump in and shut things off. Unfortunately, there were still people there (10pm). They've got this big case and were hard at work at it. Cuz of that, Al and I headed out to a movie just to buy them some time. Tupac Resurrections. It was ok...I had always seen Tupac as a role model and really felt his emotions in his songs. The movie was ok...interesting...but maybe better as a rental. Well, back to the office..and yes..they were still there. Well, 20 min later, they wrapped up..and i was able to shut things down and go home.
Now the question will be for Sunday. Gotta figure out when i can turn things back on, plus a meeting in anaheim at noon...and i was planning on visiting friends in SD. Man..i am a work-a-holic. Either way..i still have monday off...so should be able to rest then. Now to finish this post and get some sleep. Nite all.

[2pac]Now I clown around when I hang around with the Underground
Girls use to frown, say I'm down, when I come around
gas me and when they pass me they use to diss me
harrass me, but now they ask me if they can kiss me
Get some fame, people change, wanna live they life high
same song, can't go wrong, if I play the nice guy
(clamin that they must have changed,just because we came strong)
I remain, still the same (why Tu'?) cause it's the same song
- Digital Underground - Same Song

Point to Ponder
Will I make it to SD tomorrow? Hope so.

Only had two hours of sleep the other nite, so came home and passed out when i got home. Decided to take some time off of work...yet i find myself still doing stuff.
Was able to run some errands and stuff...get a haircut...go to the dentist. He changed out my fillings...eww...well no more metal in the mouth. My dentist, he's really cool. Get to watch DVDs while they work. I swear..it will take a root canal before i can finish Phonebooth.
I have a craving for a McGriddle...and I have to be awake by 11am to shut down servers in Australia. So...I'm off to bed. Sad..i need an alarm to make sure i'm up by 11. =p

Heaven... I'm in heaven,
And my heart beats so that I can hardly speak.
And I seem to find the happiness I seek,
When we're out together dancing cheek to cheek.
- Irving Berlin - Cheek to Cheek
hey..got green mile on.=p

Point to Ponder
What am I gonna do tomorrow?

Today was a good day. Didn't get enough sleep, but i was there for a friend. Had to wake up butt ass early in the morning to sit mysteriously in 2 hours of traffic. Now unfortunately, thats not that unusual,..but the weird thing is there was no accident or anything?? Just traffic all around.

Had some good talks and catching up with my friend nancy. Figured out what each one of us have been up to this past year..even though we work walking distance from each other. So that was fun..and I told her i'd post our talk...well..some of it. =p

nancy: today's journal: chat w/my dear pal nancy
ray: haha
nancy: she finally made time for me
nancy: no longer giving me lame excuses why she can't keep my company
nancy: *me
nancy: a good start?
nancy: :-P
ray: dork dork dork
yes...thats a lesson to all of you...no more lame excuses. =p


Also for my friend Maureen and Bern hanging out in MI this weekend for the KDPhi convention.
Here's my picture...for you to solicit cute girls for me. Cute girl in picture was used just to make the photo more appealing. =) (thanks beki)



Some other "interesting" things i found today.

Puff puff choke

Learn to Cwalk tutorial. Read the captions. hahah

You're chewing on a clam
moral of the story...never say the soup is cold.

Is this the look of a guilty man...well..weird definately. The article is much more disturbing...ewww


Your butt is mine
Gonna tell you right
Just show your face
In broad daylight
I'm telling you
On how I feel
Gonna hurt your mind
Don't shoot to kill
Come on,
...
Because I'm bad, I'm bad-come on
(Bad bad-really, really bad)
- Michael Jackson - Bad
geez..i know he'll be singing a different key in prison...or will he?

Point to Ponder
Will Micheal Jackson be singing a different key...in prison?
Ok...guess i just talk more when i'm tired...and oddly..get more done as well. Humm.
Maureen/Bern...i want to see some names in this comment field. =p
Ps..just posted the journal to Friendster. So...all you that i approved and never get to talk to...just say hi.

Today was actually ok. I got to the gym and had some good conversations with friends. Actually been on the phone a lot today. Getting a lot of APO drama. Don't understand why people get so political and uptight about stuff. Why can't we just be about the service???

Oh well...i've been up too late...and have to actually wake up early tomorrow. So i think i'll just leave it at that.

Today was just an odd day. I have much to do at work...but couldn't seem to get my mind to doing it. Didn't feel like doing anythign till I was about to leave. Did talk to a friend today that I haven't heard from in a while(since he's supposedly busy at school =p). Hope things are cool and you know I'm always here for you man. Hit me up whenever...i'll make time for you.
I think i just need a haircut...whenever it gets long..i just seem to drag. Weird huh? oh well...planning on taking Fri and Mon off of work..but gonna have to possibly come in sun or so.

Everday I thank the lord above that your with me(your with me)
Tell me why would I throw that away(why would I throw that away)
What can I do to prove that this is where I wanna be(yea)
So I may look occasionally
Your the only one I need

If I wanted
(That girl)
Then I would be with
(That girl)
But that one ain't for me
She's fine as hell but she'll always be
(That girl)
Nothin' more then
(That girl, no matter what she do she don't compare to you)
- Marques Houston - That Girl
I'll have to check the mp3 download on that site.

Point to Ponder
Where is steve lee with his comments =p?

Finished 2 large bottles of soju last nite...with the help of my friends =p. The birthday girl only sipped 1 and a half shots, and reaffirmed the fact that she hates alcohol. All in all, it was fun. Skipped out on working out...and felt a lil bad about it...but oh well.
Best parts of the day was watching Elf with Alfred and my dad. Wasn't expecting much, and was pleasently surprised. It was a really good story and funny in all the right places. Just a nice way to end the weekend.
I don't think i'll try for the dance class tonite, instead getting to the gym...and maybe a movie.

You got me lifted shifted higher than a ceiling
And ooh wee it’s the ultimate feeling
You got me lifted feeling so gifted
Sugar how you get so fly?
Sugar sugar how you get so fly?
- Baby Bash Featuring Frankie J - Suga Suga
I used to hate this song till i saw the video =p. Check out Ms. Tasty Pop on launch.yahoo.com

Point to Ponder
Should I move into my aunt's house in montebello?

Nothing much going on today. Went to an anime-expo meeting and possibly watching elf with alfred later. Gonna chill with the guys later to celebrate Sharon's Bday (21 baby). Gonna go for some soju again (maybe try a couple flavors). Yeah!.
May skip out on the gym..but we'll see. Need to plan that out better. Visits are good...but i may need to structure it a bit more. Plus..thinking about that dance class again. humm. Well...we'll just see how the nite goes.

Yeah, it's been a while since I've hollered from the town,
Mess around heard young ginome said "I've gotta be down"
Cause new styles is goin down, look around you
Tunes from the Luniz spread round an round you
Back to get my O on, they let me flow on
The thirty-five on it,
Yeah, I'm on it,
Still brinin satin for them draws
Velvet for the mic and got a pound for the cause
- Da Luniz (remix) - I got 5 on it

Point to Ponder
I wanna learn another language...humm..what should it be?

I had a lot of fun today. I wasn't expecting much, but maybe thats why i enjoyed it more.
So...i had my 2nd day pass to Disney California Adventure to redeem today...since i used the first day on mantha's bday. I called up Alfred to see if he wanted to hang..if not i would just walk around seeing whatever.
I had been to california adventures before...but wasn't impressed.
Well...today was different. I have come to accept that I am very much a Disney kid. Seeing the little kids dancing around to music..and hearing the famous songs from the Disney movies reminded me why i am the person i am today. Believing in yourself, seeking that one true love, good triumphing over evil, just being yourself...all common themes....but sadly lost in today's society. I've come to expect the happy ending...but i know it doesn't happen all the time. i always try to look for the good in life...and see beyond the bad. I guess you can say i maintain a certain innocence...but I'm definately not naive.
Well..today helped remind me to just stay true to myself...and see what happens.

So it definitely was a good day. Alfred, Brenda, and Rozelle came out and we just chilled for most of the afternoon. Later Tony and Brenda's sister Vivian came out to join us. I love hanging with my cousins (and friends close enough to be family). We rode most of the rides and saw the shows. Saw the Aladdin show. That was a really good show starred by DeeDee from the Mickey Mouse club. I know mantha would have loved it...since the whole cast seemed pretty cool. Even riding the simple stuff at the park (those chairs suspended in air) just seemed to be more enjoyable. One of the best parts of the nite was being there with Vivian as she rode her first big roller coaster. It was so much fun i had to get the pic of us.



=)
Vivian is on the front left.
Sometimes its just the lil things.

I can show you the world
Shining, shimmering, splendid
Tell me princess, now when did
You last let your heart decide?
I can open your eyes
Take you wonder by wonder
Over, sideways and under
On a magic carpet ride
A whole new world
A new fantastic point of view
- Lea Salonga\Brad Kane - a whole new world - Disney

Point to Ponder
Think about what I said...innoscent, but not naive...and just the acceptance of being yourself.

ahh...
Sushi was good last nite and thanks to ventura traffic, i was actually able to get to the gym before the guys showed up. It actually was a pretty good guys night out.
Today was a good day as I was able to clean up a lot of stuff...and take care of a number of open issues. Still just keeping busy.

Saw this article on Blogger. Mom finds blog. Thought it was pretty funny since i think my mom found out about it the same way. Not sure what my feelings are about that. I guess it shows in one way trying to connect...but pretty sad when you think about it. Oddly, it was the only way my brother and i connected before we made our peace with each other. Guess time will only tell for the latter.

On that note, also realizing more people are reading this than i thought...so i guess going public wouldn't be too much of a big deal. Funny...since NO ONE COMMENTS. =p. yeah...it would be nice to know people are listening when you talk...but no biggie....i say what i feel for myself...and not anyone else.

Watch out for the medallion my diamonds are wreckless
Feels like a MIDGET is hanging from my neckless
- Ludacris - stand up

Point to ponder
What is the matrix?

I hate LA traffic, when it takes me 2 hours to get to work...
and my ride home looks like the christmas parade.

LA Traffic

Anyways...CHOMPS sushi baby...3 weeks waiting...
then prob some soju.

Ugg...thats the first time Blogger has actually eaten one of my posts. Darn...didn't save it either.
So i'll try to recreate. (ps...I love the fact u can change time and date of post now)
----
Tonite i actually hit the gym after a long frat meeting. Didn't stay to long since i have an early morning for work.
Actually might take a workout break tomorrow...since sushi nite is up again. yumm...its been too long. =p
Other thing is I'm actually losing weight (scary huh). Once i get my website running, I'll keep running tabs on my progress with it.

This is (was) actually written the nite of nov 12..but i "cheat" a lil on the timing, since I'm trying to be consistant with my goal. So anytime u see 11.59 of that they...that would likely be the reason.
Ok..gonna crash.

Now in my younger days I used to sport as sag
When I went to school I carried lunch in a bag,
With an apple for my teacher 'cause I knew I'd get a kiss.
Always got mad when the class was dismissed
- Pharcyde - Passing me by

Point to Ponder
Isn't it ironic to have "rules" of war?

keeping to my commitment (blogging and working out)...and pretty happy about it.
Guess this will be day 11 since i started on the first.

Had to think about things...how words affect me...and how i react to it. I guess I tend to over-analyze a lot of things.

Did i tell you how much i love my sister? She has to be one of the greatest listeners and counselor. Thanks sis for being there. =)

Otherwise...things been going ok. Likely to check out the new office tomorrow. Gonna set up the server for the elementary school i work for and host my own webpage. Keeping things really organized helping me keep things in line.

thinking of getting back to my roots and personal growth. After checking out the ballroom dance group, thinking of getting involved again with the Filipino club. Doubt I'd do a PCN again..but looking to reconnect.

I never wanted anything as much as I want you with me.
You were the one who said to follow my dreams,
Of having a house, a car, a view of the stars, and a beautiful wife,
So I need someone I can go with,
I need some love in my life.

So I, I want to know,
If you really want me to go,
And if so, Are you coming with me?
I, I want to know,
Should I really, really go,
And if so, Come with me
- Shai - Come with me

Point to Ponder
Humm...when should i go "public" with this blog?

Actually got to the gym...and caught up with Joe regarding the reunion.
Guess i didn't miss much..and saved some dough. He said it was pretty whack.

I did also make it to the dance class. I guess it was what to be expected. Felt a lil too lax...but there were quite a few people there. Unfortunately..i didn't see anything to aspire to...so not sure if i would really want to do it. i guess you get what you pay for...and since this is free...it wasn't much. It wouldn't hurt to kill a couple hours though.


Yeah, this is how we chill from 93 'til
This is how we chill from 93 'til...
- 93 till infinity - Souls of Mischief

Point to Ponder
Was the PVT Jessica Lynch rescue staged? Why would you bring a video camera to a rescue operation? humm.

Hoping to hit the gym tonite...
but gonna try the UCLA ballroom dance class first.
Salsa baby!

Skiddish me will see if i can just observe first...but more likely than not...get dragged onto the dance floor. Course...usually a 5 girls to 1 guy ratio in dance classes. =p

Isn't it sad...that in order to make it thru the dating scene...
you have to have no heart....so you won't get hurt...
only to find the special person that can look past it all those walls
and really touch your heart??

Seems ironic and stupid to me...but maybe thats why I don't do this very well.

I built a wall
Out of this heart of mine
Never letting no one in
Didn't think I need a friend
Until now, feeling this way won't do
I'm ready to give all of me
the question that I have of you
Will he say the things he needs to say
Or touch me in a certain way
I told myself just to be strong
One day the man will come along
- Tamia - This time it's love

i'm a creature of habit...
even though i try to make sure i go to the gym everyday..
or promise to blog about something each day...

sometimes...i just don't know if i can say what i want to say...
i think i'll just leave it at that.

Ok..i cheat. This is written the nite of Nov 8..(more like 3.30am of sun morning)..but technically part of the same day =).

Anyways, today was a good day. Woke up from a much needed sleep to hit the gym. Afterwards met yup with the AX crew to watch Matrix again...in the IMAX theatre. It was great just seeing everyone again. I'm glad I'm surrounded by such good friends.

Unfortunately, because i was with them most of the nite, I did miss out on my 10 year reunion. Talking to one of my friends that actually went...i hear i didn't miss much. I'll have to get more details later.

Oddly...one of my highlights for the evening was hanging with UCSD and UCI in LA. Many of the brothers came up for the interchapter service tomorrow. We were all camped out at someone's apartment when they included me in a game of mafia. Honestly, I'd have to say the those two school have some of the friendliest and outgoing brothers. I always feel the love when i go to those chapters...and i am really proud of what they have done. I wish i had actually planned to do the service, cuz i was almost convinced to stay there tonite. Well..i'll definately plan a visit in the near future.

Matrix Theme music Main Title - Don Davis

Point to Ponder
Are the wildfires still going on?

Ug...Hot shower and a shave.
been a long day at work, ended up staying here overnite.
I guess its karma for all the times i just sit at work.
Likely missing another work out day...but i think it was for a good reason. Hanging out with cousins and a friend. Saw Intolerable Differences, but the company was more entertaining. Plus there was this guy that was straight snoring through the whole movie.

Right now I just feel icky since I've been here all nite. Unfortunately, this is LA..so u are going no where when you hit Friday nite traffic. But now that the major project is done, I can just continue to clean up my area and stuff...and hopefully make it more presentable.

Getting responses on the ADT reunion. Hoping to see some old friends again. Starting to look forward to it.

Supersonic
You see, the “S” is for super, and the “U” is for unique
The “P” is for perfection and you know that we are freaks
The “E” is for exotic, and the “R” is for raps
So tell those nosy people just to stay the hell back
- JJ Fad - Supersonic
This one is to my brother...cuz i heard this at the Halloween party...and he was the first person i thought of. =)

Point to Ponder:
How was the chocolate cookie invented?

The dating game....why does it have to be so complicated.
I like you...hopefully you like me.
Lets see where it goes from there.

If i was a lil kid, I'd just grab your hand and hold it while we walk.
Humm...i think i may just have to try that. =)

I've been watching you
for so very long
trying to get my nerve built up to be so strong
I really want to meet you
but I'm kind of scared
cause you're the kind of lady
with so much class.
- Jodeci - Come and Talk to Me

Well...i ditched working out yesterday...i think for a good reason.
Saw the matrix revolutions at midnite last nite with a group of friends...
It was a good wrap up to the whole series...but i still think the first one was the best.
Got my MP3 player from Ed...so loving that...which brings me to my next post.

i don't want to close my eyes anymore.
As i mentioned previously...music does a lot for me. i think its because of i can feel the emotional connection to it. Music you can't really fake. I just don't know if its been hurting me though. =/

i know i'm a romantic....and when i hear love songs...i get filled with this whole idea/feeling of what love is. When i sing..its all of me...i get really involved...esp if its a love song (more like singing in the car...as opposed to singing in the shower). I can only assume that is what love feels like...and why i find myself in constant pursuit of it.
To me its magical...special...meaningful...and everything. I've created this huge image...of what love is...and lately just question whether this pursuit is as pointless as chasing unicorns.

fortunately/unfortunately...I'm a believer. I need only look at the recent marriage of my friend Bryan and Angela*, to re-affirm my belief that true love is possible. It was actually there that I started singing "freely" again. I was dancing with a friend, when a slow song from selena came on...and i found myself singing to the person. Now this (singing to someone) is typically reserved to people i am comfortable with or genuinely interested in...and in this case...i wasn't particularly interested in this person either...so instead...i found myself singing with my eyes closed. That tends to happen...when i feel i want to let free this emotion...but no one to direct it to.
i found this quote...about love being less of the feeling...and more of the actions. I don't want to confuse infatuation with actual love...but the feeling can be so strong...cuz i have felt it before.

Love...is less a feeling than an action-it's the sustained ability to put someone else's needs above yours day after day, year after year.

I guess when it comes down to it...I'm gonna keep my eyes and let me self take more chances on finding it. It may not hit me at first...but i know i'll find it again. I need only look at some of my friends to truly believe that it is attainable (Bryan-Angela, Jojo-Dao, Alfred-Brenda, and many others.) I don't want to close my eyes anymore...i just want to see the person i want to sing to.

Girl I care about you
I'm there for you
So why don't you care for me,
like I care about you
-Milestone, Soul Food Soundtrack

* darn geocities won't allow outside links. So copy past this into a browser.
http://www.geocities.com/sasami514/pics/angelaandbryan.jpg

ray: ahhh...u've reminded me that true love is still possible
(sigh)
bryan: ha ha....
ray: (sentimental sob)
bryan: no problem.
ray: really though..i'm really happy for you.
bryan: i am glad that i can share it with you.
ray: i was starting to more or less give up on the idea...
bryan: oh.. ha ha
bryan: no.. never give up.. but don't try to hard..
bryan: love will come to you!

Yeah...this is pretty much how I looked on halloween. Rain and all.
Gonna have my matrix marathon today....ending with REVOLUTIONS at 12am. Yippee...

Plus I'm gonna post about music and me...prob soon...so gonna start adding favorite lines and such. So here is the first.
sunny days everybody loves them
tell me baby can you stand the rain?
storms will come
this we know for sure(this we know for sure)
can you stand the rain?
-New Edition

Point to Ponder
What two coins make 30 cents? One of them is not a nickle. If you watched Scrubs last week, you would have gotten it.

Yeah...i can see that.
volunteers? =)



cuddle and a kiss on the forehead - you like to be
close to your special someone and feel warm,
comfortable, and needed


What Sign of Affection Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Humm..
How many "rebirths" does one go through...before they finally make a change?
I've constantly said to myself...i gotta do this...or i need to do this...but many a times...it just falls to the wayside. Well..not to jinx myself now...I'm gonna do it again.

I've decided to be more of action. I definitely am a planner, but fail mostly on execution. I am thinking of others, but now...I just want to be more selfish. Life is passing me by...but now I'm gonna grab it and enjoy the moment.

So...here is my proposal. i'm looking to improve myself. I was about to say.."but the question is how?"...but thats not the right attitude anymore. Now is the time for action...

So here is my ACTION PLAN
Physical - I will visit the gym each day. Its the one club I pay for every month..but hardly go. No matter what, I will stop by to do something. (Already started this past week. Really cool going swimming again...that and sitting in the spa ^_^).
Mental - Thanks to someone, I've decided to read more. Almost done with Joy Luck Club...thought I should get back on it. Tired of mental stagnation. With that note, I will also try to spark some mental debates/challenges/Things that make you go.. hummm right here on the blog. I'd like to hear the comments and see what intellectual discussions come about it. Or sometimes it may just be something fun.
Spiritual - Man...wasn't even gonna put that. My relationship with God is...ok...not the best. But that will be something that will eventually be restored. (that and some other relationships).
Personal - I'm looking at cooking and dancing classes. Gonna look to attend the Ballroom dance club at UCLA.



So with that..the first point to ponder.

If Snickers satisfies, why do you need a King Size version. This also applies to Gatoraid and maybe Nyquil.

double double, animal style with animal style fries. Thats the only way to go now.

Yeah! Halloween..
So last minute this morning i decide on going as Neo (Matrix...as if you didn't know) to work. Of course..sucks when you are the only one in the office getting into the spirit of things.

Anyways...heading out with friends for festivities in West Hollywood. Kinda wanna see the pussycat dolls...so gonna stay out for that.

Happy Halloween everyone. =)

Ok...since i don't post that often...I'll start just putting the lil stuff every so often. Remember...in blue...just random topics. Font in black is the more thought provoking ones.


So...10 year High School reunion this year. Not exactly "excited" about going...but I am gonna go anyways (did the same thing going to prom)...just didn't want to regret missing.

Plus you never know...i'll get to meet all the Joseph girls that I never met in HS. Hahaha..funny thing..in the memory book...when it asked if I could go back and change something..what would i do....i said "go to a co-ed High School".

On another note, seems my company is expanding..and opening an office in pasadena. Definately not time to hire an assistant yet (sorry all my IT friends)...but means I'll be running between offices while it gets started.
Puts me in a quandry of sorts when it comes to looking for my own place. Maybe Monterey Park, Alhambra...who knows.

So I turn it to you...
Comments..comments....
recommendations on where to live...between Westwood and Pasadena?

Teddy Bomb. what a sad world....when u think about it. The symbol of childhood turned into something deadly.

Childhood

Damn...this was just gonna be a short post...but now its got me thinking.

What's wrong with being a child? Remembering the my younger years....when your biggest concern was not eating too much chocolate. The most expensive video game system failed in comparison to running around in the sprinklers. When your $5 allowance bought you candy and a world of imagination. I used to wake up at 5am just to watch cartoons. Now I find myself sometimes going to bed at that time.

Yes...we all grow older in age. We all mature. We become more educated. That doesn't mean we have to forget that innocence that makes us see the world through rose colored lenses. Am i deluding myself, in believing in the better parts of people? Thinking we are more good than bad? If you think that...I'm sorry.
You're in a bitter world... I'm just living in mine.

Dang...if i had a lawn with sprinklers...i'd probably be running through it right now. In the meantime, I think i'll settle for a bag of water balloons and some targets/friends. =p

Also on that note, I'm going to DISNEYLAND Friday....and the best part of it, is I'll be going with my sister (her bday) and my brother (yeah, he's back ^_^).

killing some time...trying to avoid traffic.
welcome jojo to the blogging world =p. I think you're gonna have too much fun with this...and yes..this update is for you.

Jojo got me hooked on launch radio on yahoo....now i don't need cable anymore.
I got a free trip to Japan in Jan...so looking forward to that. Need to go update the Passport and stuff.

finishing up a bunch of lessons in my Dreamweaver book..so again (like you haven't heard it already), expect a site update soon.
Oh yeah..getting back into tennis too...that was hella cool. Looking for anyone that wants to play out in Westwood during the week.

Let me know... =)

Video of the moment: Justin Timberlake: Cry me a River

Man...wonder if I can pull off that haircut...tried it once..but didn't like it too much.
And sam..yeah..after watching Friends last nite...i admit..i'm definately Ross. =p

Also realized that I mumble. Maybe thats why I like IM a lot. I was told I had a soft voice...I said...its calming. But I do project...when i do public speaking...
but when ur chilln with the homies...don't need to feel like yelling. But yeah...working on that as well. Maybe people should call more ^_-

OK..better find something more to kill time. I may just start daily updates. Prob look like this:

Work..ok..
thats pretty much it.
but I find ways to make it entertaining. Either that or outside activities.

PS - Al's your off the link list for never updating. You call anyways.
Diana...I'm glad ur site came back up...I'll have to IM you sometime.